Calling All Remix Artists!

Are you a master of mashups? Can you whirl around music on your MacBook like a Pro? Does the electronica at most clubs seem puerile and basic?

Well then, I have a mission for you. Megan Phelps-Roper (scion of the Fred Phelps, head of the Westboro Baptist Church) released a cover of Lady Gaga's "Telephone", and wouldn't you know it? It's delightfully hateful.

SOOooooooo… I don't think we should be insulted. Or angry. Or even slightly annoyed. Nope. I think we should use the song.

You know what I want to do? Make out to a boy on the TuezGayz dance floor to a remix of this song. I'd say we could just use the original, but bitch can't sing. This shit needs to be autotuned.

Seriously, what better way for revenge? I'm turning off Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On" and putting this on next time I turn the lights low. It might freak out my beau, but… he's dirty.

Apparently, she also has a "Poker Face" cover. Delightful.

I know Austin has a hell of a lot of damn talented mixologists (and not the alcoholic kind). Make this shit drrrrrty, and I'll be your bestie. Promise. Proms.

As for Ms. Phelps-Roper? Sugar lumps, God don't hate fags. God hates your forehead.

Sorry, eight-head.