The Hightower Report

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IGNORANCE AND ARROGANCE IN ACTION

Time for another Gooberhead Award, presented periodically to someone whose tongue is going 100 miles an hour, but who forgot to put his brain in gear.

Today's Goober is John Cornyn, a little-known U.S. Senator from Texas who's trying to become a big name by rewriting the constitutional genius of the founders. Ignorance is a bad quality in a public official, but add arrogance, and you've got a dangerous goober on your hands.

John's all puffed up with the fumes of arrogance because he's chairman of the Senate's Constitution subcommittee. The best public service one can offer in this position is to kill politically inspired amendments that other Congress critters are always tossing out, especially in election years. Instead, Cornyn himself has become the premier political posturer, using his position to propose not one or two amendments ... but five!

For example, he wants to allow members of Congress to be appointed, rather than democratically elected, in the event that some are killed in a terrorist attack. This has already been overwhelmingly rejected by the Republican-controlled House on the basis that it's undemocratic, unnecessary, and ... well, silly.

Of course, he also trots out the old right-wing war cry for an amendment banning flag burning, claiming that the 9/11 terrorist attacks necessitate this restriction on the people's right to free speech. In addition, he's pushing one to ban same-sex marriages – an odd assertion of big-government power over individuals by a so-called conservative, not to mention that it would make rank discrimination Constitutional.

My favorite Cornynism, though, is his push for a balanced-budget amendment, outlawing deficit spending. This from a guy who has voted for every one of George Bush's budget-busting boondoggles, from Star Wars to tax giveaways for the rich, creating a budget that's now half-a-billion dollars in the red. If you want a balanced budget, John – just vote for one!

What a goober.

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MAKING AMERICA'S PARKS GLEAM AGAIN

When conservatives bellow that they want to slash the number of federal employees – they usually don't have our ever-helpful park rangers in mind for the slashing.

People love rangers. Mainly because they're ... well, helpful – teaching us about the ancient cliff dwellers at Mesa Verde, guiding us along the Appalachian Trail, or bringing Lincoln's Gettysburg Address to life.

Yet, while politicians of all stripes praise park rangers and give tribute to the majesty of our national parks, forests, seashores, monuments, and wilderness areas – they're deadbeats when it comes to paying the bill to keep these treasures in place and in good repair. Washington routinely shortchanges these assets, resulting today in an inadequate number of rangers to meet the public's need and a growing backlog of maintenance just to keep our parks from falling apart.

George W., who campaigned as a Teddy Roosevelt-style park-lover, promised that he would eliminate that backlog within five years. But, instead, it has grown by as much as $3 billion since he's been in office. And, while he claims to have boosted the budget of the Park Service, it's nowhere near enough to make up for the increased number of park visitors, or the added burden of homeland-security requirements he put on the service. The operating budget is estimated to be $600-million-a-year short of what's needed.

So our national treasures, which the overwhelming majority of Americans love, are crumbling – unsafe trails, broken facilities, closed-off areas, shortages of guides and interpreters, shorter hours, and locked visitors centers.

Where'd the money go? To tax giveaways for the richest people in America, to Halliburton's fraud-ridden contracts in Iraq, to George's Star Wars fantasies, to his unlimited and unbudgeted warmongering, and to billions of dollars in corporate welfare. Take just 10% of that money back, and our parks would again gleam like the gems they are.