News Ticker: August 27

David Dewhurst spins a yarn, Louie Gohmert fuels the fire, and Mike Martinez lends a helping hand. Self-promotion is on the News Ticker.

• Say what you will about Atty. Gen. Greg Abbott, but he always has time for his pet projects.

• An activist group called Climate Name Change has asked the World Meteorological Organization to name strong storms after climate change deniers. Gov. Rick Perry is a particular target. Not only does he ignore science, but his hairspray use alone has caused seven tropical storms last season.

• A new University of Texas study says that the earthquakes in South Texas are probably caused by an increase in oil production. The alternate theory that God is really irritated by Rep. Louie Gohmert has largely been disproved.

• Speaking of the sack-suited ninnyhammer, he's still peddling his Muslim Brotherhood conspiracy theories.

• Turns out that Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst's claim to the Allen Police Department that he is the "number one pick of all of the law enforcement agencies within Texas" isn't exactly true. He's more like that guy from the office you don't mind working with, but would never invite over for a barbecue.

• The new Poopgate documents released by the Texas Department of Public Safety are apparently much a-doo about nothing.

• Finalists for the State Fair's Big Tex Choice Award include deep fried Nutella balls, chicken-fried meatloaf squares, and lightly battered business cards served with a bit of salsa for kick.

• Hyde Park Market has been forced by the city to take down its famed flags due to a "code violation."

• Council Member Mike Martinez is very brave, says Council Member Mike Martinez about Council Member Mike Martinez.