Public Notice
Pure H-E Double L
By Kate X Messer, Fri., June 18, 1999
D-I-V-O-R-C-E
by Bobby Braddock and Curley Putman
Our little boy is four years old and quite a little man
So we spell out the words
we don't want him to understand
Like T-O-Y or maybe S-U-R-P-R-I-S-E
But the words we're hiding from him now
Tear the heart right out of me
Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
Me and little J-O-E will be goin' away
I love you both and it will be pure H-E double L for me
Oh, I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E
Watch him smile, he thinks it Christmas
Or his fifth birthday
And he thinks C-U-S-T-O-D-Y spells fun or play
I spell out all the hurtin' words
And turn my head when I speak
'Cause I can't spell away this hurt
That's drippin' down my cheek.
Stuck in the Middle With You & You
Here's a list of local resources for couples considering divorce, smack dab in the middle of a divorce, or post-divorce trauma survivors. The emphasis here is on families with kids and resources for the little ones and mom and dad.
In some states, the law requires that divorcing parties mediate. Some states also require a parenting class for any breakup that involves kids. Locally, while not required by the State of Texas, the Moving Through program is offered through the Austin Child Guidance Center. It's an excellent class touching on some basics to keep parents aware of what their kids are enduring. (Most of the resources listed here are culled from the session's workbook.) Moving Through is offered monthly; call for time, date, and location. 451-2242.
Bar This!
Finding an attorney or mediator can be a depressing, ugly task. But it doesn't have to be. Call these services if you find yourself between a barrister and a hard place.
State Bar of Texas 463-1463
Legal Aid Society 476-7244
Austin Lawyers Care 476-5550
Travis Co. Lawyer Referral Service 472-8303
Austin Association of Mediators 206-0401
Dispute Resolution Center 443-5981
Heart to Hang on To
Sometimes kids just need someone to talk to or a group to share similar family experiences. A variety of support groups and counseling services are available. Child & Family Services, Pathways Counseling, and Youth Options have been rolled under one umbrella: Lifeworks. The new org provides the same type of counseling and guidance for kids caught in the middle as the individual groups did. 327-8018.
The aforementioned Austin Child Guidance Center has a variety of services. 451-2242.
You might explore Capital Area Psychological Info & Referral Service, 451-4983, Divorce Recovery & Family Resources Center and Step Families Austin, 459-9511, New Life Institute, 469-9447, or your local school, church, and believe it or not, your employer.
Hang in There, Baby!
It's also important to remember to take care of yourself. How else can you be a good parent and a good negotiator? Here is some local support for mom and dad.
• Kids Xchange, Inc. can act as a "safe zone" for families in the middle of visitation disputes. They can set up neutral meeting places and assist with transitions between visits. 472-3588.
• Parents Without Partners offers free support from and for people who've been there. They publish an impressive newsletter each month (May, 1999, was 35 pages!) brimming with activities and recommendations for support and services. 251-9982.
• Parents Anonymoushas a schedule of free support groups and parenting/nurturing classes. 800/554-2323.
• Harvest League Foundation and Second Blessing Marketplaceexist solely to assist single parent families in crisis. 374-9393.
