Second 'Live Nude Fish' Sign Stolen

Dear Editor,
    Amazonia Aquariums has had our second live nude fish sign stolen! The first one got swiped, I sent out a press release, and we got some press coverage on that story. A local sign company called BuildASign.com saw our stolen sign story and kindly gave us a free new sign that was hanging for about two weeks. Then, this weekend it was stolen as well. Now exactly who needs all these live nude fish signs anyway? Pray tell, who else has nude fish that need advertising? Exactly how can stuff get stolen right on I-35 with hundreds of cars passing by? Why are live nude fish signs so popular with thieves? I am thinking of putting in a security camera and starting a new reality show called Stupid Thieves With No Life Caught on Camera. The next sign might say, "Smile your on live nude fish cam." In response Amazonia is going to make live nude fish shirts that say "steal this shirt" on the back. Our live nude fish are so popular that now we may have to paint a giant mural that says live nude fish on the side of the building. Let's see them steal that!