Cowpokes in Their Underpants, and Their Ladies

OPEN IMAGE GALLERY

Don't eff with 'em, fellas.

In honor of No Pants Day (four hours of daylight left!), I present you with the following image: Ann Richards in her underwear.

Go ahead. Think about it. You know you want to. Aero-engineered brassiere (the word "bra" does not suffice). Full-length paneled girdle (here worn over pantyhose). Sensible black shoes and an early-stage, low-flying bouffant.

If that's not floating your boat, how about Barbara Jordan? Tailored navy slip, very Ralph, matching 1.5-inch, peep-toe pumps and, yes, glasses, what appears to be a watch, and strangely hammy hands.

Fine: Jayne Mansfield (white Mirabeau bikini), Selena (black bra with white lace appliqué, tights, cap), George Strait (tighty whities, Stetson), and/or Jack Johnson (knit boxing shorts with blue sash belt) more to your liking? Tom Tierney does 'em all up and more in Famous Texas Women and Famous Texas Men Paper Dolls. They'll make you squeal (though maybe only on the inside). If the carefully styled and perfectly chosen skivvies don't get you, the random assortment of Texas characters will (Hello Beyoncé and Sam Houston, where's Lady Bird?).

And for style-obsessed natives who grew up toddling to Neiman's (is there any other kind?), it's a heavenly confluence, indeed. Who didn't dream of playing with paper dolls of Ima Hogg, Quanah Parker, and Larry Hagman, all with three meticulously researched costumes?

I mean, damn.