Bedside Manner: The Captain's Quarters

OPEN IMAGE GALLERY

Arrrrrrrrrrrrr... (photo by KXM)

Really? You want to know what's on the nightstand in this ol' patroon's quarters for this latest installment of the Books Dept.'s Under the Covers: Bedside Manner series? Point the scope abaft, mates, and a sturdy little bamboo three-shelver belonging to the dyke who runs Gay Place should come into focus…

This small rattan wonder has seen her share of fores and afts on this tight li'l ship, but these days she is smiling at reveries of faerie and mermaid and swamp rat processions as cappy feathers the wardroom for the arrival of a singular and exceptional queen. What cargo is this bucket currently hauling?

There is such pressure in committing this list to bloggage. Should we embellish? Or minimize for purposes of customs and tax evasion? There are books, to be sure, but this boatswain doesn't have as much time as craved for the pleasure of reading, as pulling of rig and tightening of jib fill so many windswept hours. A quick survey of recent Bedside Manners posted by Chron-mateys poses questions of how much Safe-for-Work deck-swabbing happens in these logs. We bet a lot. Our crew is a horny lot, you see, and to us, these posts seem a tad sanitized. Sorry, that's not happening on this vessel. If sex with a hardy sailor offends, it is time for you to disembark. And so, without further demurrage:

HEREIN LIES THE MANIFEST OF H.M.S. KATE X NIGHTSTAND:
(and sorry, despite the build-up, no ripping yarns about pirates or naughty nauticals…)

Moregasm: Babeland's Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex by Claire Cavanah and Rachel Venning. Any good editor keeps a few writing prompts lying about. Just sayin'.

A bottle of Caldrea (Sandlewood Riceflower)
A tube of Good Clean Love

Swamplandia by Karen Russell (having just special ordered her debut St. Lucy's Home for Girls Raised by Wolves from our beloved BookWoman)

Opening Up by Tristan Taormino
The Ethical Slut (2nd ed.) by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy

A silver-sequined wristband
A print-out of a story/gift from a potentially great writer about the inky depths of the deep blue and a mermaid
A few Tranarchy gig cards
A bag of fingercots (calluses)
An Alamo gift card from the Car2Go fleet swap

(I laughed out loud when I saw that) Cunt by Inga Muscio (was sitting atop)
The Finger by Angus Trumble (could have made that up, but didn't). Cunt, by old buddy Inga was found at a yardsale to replenish copies given away over the years, and Finger was crazy and totally random giveaway find.

Two highball glasses for respite and libation
The bottom shelf is private, save for the box of Puffs Plus