After a Fashion
Jacko sure is Wacko and upcoming holiday fetes.
By Stephen MacMillan Moser, Fri., Nov. 29, 2002

SEASONAL SOCIAL DIARY Tuesday, Dec. 3, Mega 93.3 presents the Winter Masquerade at Element nightclub. It will feature such techno and dance artists as Daniel Beddingfield, Rockell, and Deborah Cox, among many others, as well as a costume contest. Info can be found on their Web site, www.mega933.com... Saturday, Dec. 7, 8pm-12am, Project Transitions hosts their annual Holiday Swing benefit at the Dell Jewish Community Center, 7300 Hart. Swing dance lessons begin at 7pm. For more information call 454-8646 or e-mail Justin Clanton at JClanton@ProjectTransitions.org... Friday-Sunday, Dec. 6-8, Big Red Sun and Coo de Tot will present Santa in the Garden, a benefit for SafePlace with food, music, Santa, amazing gift and décor selections, etc. Call 480-9749 for more info.
WACK-KING OFF We can't wait for the time (in a decade or so) when Michael Jackson's children begin writing horrible things about him. After the recent incident of Wacko Jacko "dangling" his 6-month-old son, Prince Michael II, over the fourth-floor balcony at his hotel in Berlin, one suspects the behind-the-scenes behavior is exponentially more hideous. Jackson admitted the public child-endangerment episode was a "terrible mistake," among so many terrible mistakes Miss Jackson makes -- like continually breeding. Jackson's multiple surgeries almost make one wonder how this is possible. But I look forward to the children's (Prince Michael I, Paris, and Prince Michael II) lurid tales of enforced plastic surgery, being forced to dress like children until they were 18, and being subjected to private performances of Daddy in drag as Diana Ross. I particularly like the photo series making the rounds on the Internet -- of Michael as the Afro-headed youngest member of the Jackson 5 to Michael as he began to alter his appearance and the various looks he's presented until we reach his current look of plaster-white pallor adorned with really bad facial butchering and peculiarly unpleasant hair. The caption under the photos says "America: the only place where a poor black boy can grow up to be a rich white woman."
GOSSIPEUSE If you like gossip like I like gossip (and I know you do), then you know that one of the best gossip columns is from Jeanette Walls at www.msnbc.com. She is a riot, most recently compiling a list from other celebrity interviewers of the Top Ten Most Boring Celebrity Interviews. Dishing on the likes of Beyoncé Knowles ("She's really a lovely person, but she doesn't speak in complete sentences"); Renée Zellweger ("She won't answer your questions. She starts asking you questions. If you ask her something, she cocks her head and says, 'You know, what I'm really interested in is you.' It's her evasive tactic"); and Melanie Griffith ("I had 90 minutes with her, and usually, you'd want a little more time with a subject. But after an hour, I was absolutely desperate to leave"). Jeanette's a dame who tells 'em like she sees 'em, in her own charming way.