First off: He’s quicker than the human eye. Second: With that cat who always solved the mysteries as assistant coach, he’d be unstoppable. Plus, bestiality concerns aside, the secretary who had a crush on him was sort of hot, in a repressed librarian sort of way.
Advantages: Wouldn’t that be some shit?
Disadvantages: Absolutely none.
Rating: 10/10

This article appears in February 2 • 2007.

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