This weekend Longhorns travel to the tiny town of Manhattan, Kan., to play the Wildcats from Kansas State. Back in Austin, a legion of Texas fans will wrestle with the existential meaning of what it’s like to play underdog to a coach who looks as confusingly ageless as that school’s Bill Snyder.
Snyder, who, save for a four-year hiatus, has coached K-State football since the first George Bush administration, is the closest thing college football has to the great baseball coach Jim Leyland – a man who looks like he turned 75 when he was actually closer to 50 and then stopped aging entirely.
He coaches at a school wherein the best thing about it is that it accepts 99% of its applicants. In fact, the school has such lax admissions standards that they were (we presume) literally the safety school for the youngest Gronkowski brother. If you’re curious about the 1% of applicants who aren’t accepted, here are some presumed fun facts:
• 75% of them are named “Travis.”
• They forgot to write their names, answer any of the questions, and submit the admissions packet.
• They accidentally and consistently spell Kansas as “Arkansas” throughout their application.
• They write their personal essay on how to manufacture methamphetamines without using any E85 ethanol.
That said, K-State’s Wildcats have managed to put together an outstanding football program. They’re the surprise leader of the Big 12 this year at 3-0 in conference, and possess a suffocating defense to go with an offense that outscored Oklahoma 31-30 last week. The Wildcats also have a lucky horseshoe shoved up their butts from last week’s narrow victory, which included not one, but two kicks missed from less than 21 yards. KSU’s quarterback, Jake Waters, is the same kind of dual-threat player that gave the Longhorns fits against Brigham Young earlier in the season.
The Longhorns, believe it or not, are not yet out of the race for the Big 12 title. Kansas State is the only remaining undefeated team in the conference, and Texas still has games remaining against three out of the other four teams ahead of them. It’s definitely a long shot, but still mathematically possible.
Realistically, Charlie Strong and company are looking at something between a 4-8 and 6-6 finish. And while they might not be the favorites in any of their remaining games, the nice thing about having such low expectations is that every win means a little bit more. Like, potentially, Kansas State this Saturday.
This article appears in October 24 • 2014.