There’s no delicate way to say this: Hands off Dangerous Touch. The only thing you might find yourself wanting to touch is yourself, for this is essentially a “stroke” movie. And, yes, there’s a certain soft-core entertainment value in such prurience, but if we try to pretend that this is anything more than sex by proxy, then we’re all sadly delusional. Where does Lou Diamond Phillips get off? (This movie makes it abundantly clear how he gets off!) Not only did he select this project for his directing debut, he also co-wrote the script and stars in Dangerous Touch. A lens the size of the Hubbell telescope couldn’t contain his unbridled narcissism, though you’ve got to give Phillips points for his confidence in continuing with this line of endeavor after the resounding disinterest that met his screenwriting debut a couple of years back with a film called Ambition. The puny plot of Dangerous Touch has Phillips playing a mysterious yet compelling man who seduces best-selling author and radio pop psychologist Kate Vernon. The seduction and multiple beddings (six times in one night, we’re told at one point) are motivated by his larger plan which involves gangsters and prison and gunplay and “variant” sex acts. At first, the sex is anonymous, dangerous and kind of Last Tango in Paris-y, minus the metaphysics (and Brando). The ending is clearly inspired by John Woo’s The Killer with its choreographed gunfight, minus a few hundred bullet volleys. Apart from the unimaginative and grossly clichéd dialogue, Dangerous Touch is hurt by its sloppiness toward details: things like the dustjacket bio on Vernon’s best-seller not only mis-punctuating Ph.D. but then going on to mention her psychoanalytic practice (for which she would need an M.D. instead). The plot is tenuous at best, and badly developed, the performances feel somewhat “phoned in” (and considering the variety of sex games sampled here, phone sex is one of the few left unexplored), and the direction is bland and self-serving. Dangerous Touch is about as sensitive and sexually stimulating as a ride on a Magic Fingers.
This article appears in October 22 • 1993 (Cover).
