Mermaids
“It made me think of sex as a terribly romantic, but ultimately disappointing, endeavor …”The first time is never what you expected. For Charlotte Flax, the gawky, sexually precocious 15-year-old played by a deliciously innocent Winona Ryder, the first time is a dizzying tumble up the stairs of a darkened church tower, into the arms of a much older bus driver (played by a forgettable Michael Schoeffling) who has unwittingly become the object of her obsessive, guilt-ridden teenage desires. As with most first sex, the buildup, which takes a good two-thirds of the movie, is far more exciting than the event: skirt up, stockings down, clenched teeth, and it’s over. (Much the same could be said of the movie’s larger conflict between the two generations of Flax women; but that’s another, far less interesting story.) At the time, Mermaids made me think of sex as a terribly romantic, but ultimately disappointing, endeavor. Ten years later, I’ve learned enough to reassess that judgment: Some things do get better with time; men aren’t necessarily among those things; and sex, like everything that’s worth doing, takes practice, and patience, to perfect.
This article appears in August 11 • 2000.