cover illustration by Jason Stout

Warning: You will need a pair of scissors, some other dangerous stuff, and a moderate attention span to successfully complete this exercise.

1) Cut out the “Triangle Park” area of the Triangle Park Robot on the cover of this issue. Mash it to your face and see how it feels.
Oooh, we know, it’s scary, but that’s only because you can’t see anything.

2) Grab the scissors again. Cut your eyes out. Good. Pace the room incessantly and begin thinking like a vengeful, overdeveloped land mass.

3) Retrieve a heavy chain, a staple gun with ample ammo, and an industrial-strength adhesive of choice. Fasten the mask to your head without regard to pain or basic common sense. When profuse bleeding ensues…

4) …scare people by bellowing “Boo! I’m a development” at parties and front porches in exchange for candy and a heartfelt “good riddance”.

This article appears in October 31 • 1997 and October 31 • 1997 (Cover).

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