Wall Street’s Sacrifice
The bonus boys of Wall Street have finally shown that they “get it” – and I’m sure you appreciate their newfound modesty as much as I do.
After much speculation on the size of the bonuses that avaricious top banking executives would grab for themselves this year, they have demonstrated remarkable restraint, joining millions of hard-hit Americans in belt-tightening solidarity. For example, Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein (who was so high on his inherent worthiness last year that he proclaimed himself to be “doing God’s work”) has now shown his morality by accepting a bonus pay of only $9 million. Yes, he tightened his belt down to the 9-million notch.
It makes you want to weep with gratitude, doesn’t it?
In fact, one Wall Street expert on executive pay practically did sob, declaring that Blankfein’s bonus “takes a lot of oxygen out of the argument that Goldman’s top of the house is overpaid,” adding that, “$9 million is not a lot of money.”
Really? The great majority of Americans, who actually do productive work, cannot imagine being paid $9 million over their entire lifetimes on the job.
Nonetheless, a spokesman for Goldman Sachs positioned the boss’ bonus as a major sacrifice and a gesture of “respect” for the mood of a public that’s been infuriated by Wall Street’s greed and recklessness. Lest you worry, however, that poor Blankfein might be forced to sell off some of his Tupperware to make ends meet, note that he pocketed a $68 million bonus in 2007 and has received more than $110 million in pay during the last decade – so, I’m guessing he’s going to be all right. Also, he still gets a chauffeur and limousine from the bank, so if he does have to go on food stamps, he can go in style.
For Wall Street’s barons, even “sacrifice” is luxurious.
Hug a Banker
Poor Wall Street bankers. They can’t find a friendly port in the unrelenting storm of public outrage at their ongoing narcissism. President Obama has publicly decried their “obscene bonuses,” and Congress is moving to impose new regulations and taxes to restrict their incurable greediness. It’s sad – but who in the world would want to hug a banker?
Wait – here comes a bank hugger! He’s John Boehner, the Republican leader of the U.S. House. And there’s Texas Sen. John Cornyn, the Republican’s chief senatorial fundraiser, offering his soft shoulder for the Wall Street crowd to cry on. Yes, the entire Republican leadership of Congress is clucking and cooing at the Wall Streeters who crashed America’s economy, offering unconditional love to them.
Well, there is one little condition: money. The party has been wining and dining the beleaguered bankers for months, pointing out that Republicans are the ones who’ve been trying to prevent Democrats from cracking down on Wall Street’s greed. “We are your true friends and your best hope to fend off the populist demands to curb those multimillion-dollar banker bonuses,” say GOP leaders. In return for being the bankers’ buddies, the Republicans are merely asking for a little love in return – in the form of bigger campaign contributions from Wall Street’s giants.
Sen. Cornyn says that he’s been visiting lower Manhattan about twice a month to collect love offerings from the reviled bankers, and Boehner recently had drinks at a Capitol Hill watering hole with the CEO of JPMorgan Chase, offering banker love in exchange for more banker cash.
Aren’t these same Republicans also trying to take over the tea bag movement? I wonder if those anti-establishment mad-as-hellers have heard that Boehner, Cornyn & Co. are making their beds with Wall Street greedheads, not with the good folks on Main Street.
This article appears in February 26 • 2010.