Say what you will about Governor Rick Perry, but he has never been shy about wielding his power. From his heavy veto pen to his endless special sessions, Goodhair has the entire state under his command. So it comes as no surprise that Perry was able to finagle a visit with Santa Claus well before the rest of us.

But that doesn’t mean that Santa has to be happy about it. This morning, Perry tweeted that Santa made an early visit to bring “some Christmas and Holiday cheer” to the Governor’s Mansion. Judging from the evidence, not one belly was shaking like a bowlful of jelly.

As usual, Anita Perry seems unimpressed. Perhaps she is subtly indicating that it will be a blue Christmas if Rick doesn’t cool it with the attacks on women’s reproductive rights. For his part, Santa looks downright hostile. Maybe he would rather be standing with Texas women too.

It bears repeating that Rick better watch out. After all, Santa knows when he is sleeping.

This article appears in December 6 • 2013.

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