Let the Music Play
Last Thursday, the Austin City Council voted 6-1 to continue funding the Austin Music Network for the remainder of its fiscal year, but with the caveat that come October, the only city-sanctioned all-music channel in the nation will be on its own. So, from the home office behind McCallum High School, here are 10 ways AMN might avoid being taken off the air for good:
10) Donate $2 from every Bob Schneider CD sold at Waterloo to a “special” fund set up by Willie Nelson‘s tax attorneys.
9) Benefits, benefits, benefits!
8) Mike Judge waives residuals from Beavis and Butt-head reruns. Please?
7) Commercials, for god’s sake.
6) Series of PSAs with Owen Temple, Kevin Fowler, et al., urging fraternities to donate a week’s beer allowance to the Music Network.
5) Michael Dell buys the network, but only to give that “Dude, you’re getting a Dell” guy something to do.
4) Looking to hold on to its Sex and the City audience, HBO buys an AMN-produced sitcom starring the Dixie Chicks as wacky, down-home wedding planners who use the f-word a lot.
3) Conspiracy-obsessed local public-access host Alex Jones rents network to show how music videos are actually a form of CIA mind control.
2) Rich UT alumni buy network after running out of sports facilities, athletes, and elected officials.
1) All Willie, all the time
This article appears in February 7 • 2003.