Dear Luv Doc,
This holiday season there seems to be an extra amount of hatred and vitriol. Terrorists, xenophobia, political polarization, and the like. What can we do to abate the hate? – PugNAYshus J. Reilly
One word, Puggy: empathy. Everybody (myself particularly) should take some time to recognize and appreciate the challenges of others. We all have a tendency to get completely wrapped up with our own needs and desires – so much so that we completely ignore the needs and desires of others. That may just be the natural result of living in a capitalistic, dog-eat-dog society where everyone is essentially forced to compete with everyone else for resources, but survival is a poor excuse to give in to our basest behaviors.
One of the benefits of being sentient is the ability to recognize and understand our selfishness and rein that shit in – not just for the well-being of ourselves but for the well-being of humanity as a whole. Empathy for most of us takes a conscious effort. More importantly, it takes practice. You can’t just roll out of bed one day and decide you are going to be empathetic. The decision to be empathetic is not empathy itself, but it’s not a bad start. As ever, it’s the follow-through that counts. It’s the day-to-day practice of this very important life skill.
I have to admit I am really shitty at it. If you have read this column more than a few times, you know I can be a little judgy – especially about people who own Camaros, or Hummers, or nugget jewelry, or shirts with tattoo designs on them, or ironic beards, or tramp stamps, or skinny jeans – the list goes on and on, and it’s the pungent manure that fertilizes this garden every week. And yet, while it certainly can be entertaining to caricature ridiculous human behavior, I am not entirely sure it is of any real benefit to humanity.
Yes, taking a cheap shot at some bad-haircut douche nozzle like Donald Trump might be providing a service to humanity if some future Donald Trump were swayed into a Vince Lombardi buzz cut and a life of pious humility and service, but that is a very weak peg to hang a hat on. Worlds don’t get changed by name-calling, they get changed by humility, empathy, compassion, and service. So yeah, a little more of that shit for everybody, starting with me. Oh, and p.s. I truly hope your real name is PugNAYshus and you have a flawlessly functioning pyloric valve.
This article appears in December 18 • 2015.
