THE DISH Fur is back in a big way. For fall, many major designers, including Gucci, Versace, Dolce & Gabbana, and Louis Vuitton, showed an abundance of fur (and many other kinds of animal hides, such as pony skin) in their collections. Fashion, good or bad, is always a barometer of our times, and this particular trend is undoubtedly a reflection of society’s feelings — fickle though they may be. This about-face attitude is not new, and manifests itself in the disease-of-the-week phenomenon as well. AIDS, for instance, couldn’t be less interesting or less fashionable to the general public anymore. Why, they’ve practically cured it, haven’t they? So let’s just direct our attentions to some other worthy cause. Perhaps we could establish a committee to accept suggestions.
I never saw fur go away anyway. In the winter, New York’s Fifth Avenue looks like it has been invaded by a pack of wild animals. Or “ranch”-bred animals. Isn’t that a charming visual? Ranch-bred. It conjures up such cute images of the animals lounging around in little bandanas and cowboy hats, chewing tobacco and shootin’ the breeze. Though in reality this may not be the case, it makes us feel better anyway. But I still never really understood why a leather jacket was okay and a fur one was not. And I can safely predict that, unfortunately or not, anti-fur crusaders will come to be seen as radicals who don’t know how to behave in public. And as with many zealots, including AIDS activists, their cause will engender a certain amount of sympathy from the public, but their tactics will not.
THE RANT I can’t possibly be the only person on earth who thinks that clothing and accessories designer Miuccia Prada is a big joke being played upon us by mean-spirited fashion editors. In truth, the accessories — shoes, bags, etc. — are well-designed and made. But those clothes — those hideously designed, poorly constructed, astronomically priced, ill-fitting garments that someone talked into being famous. And now that that has occurred, the standards of beauty and style are lowered forever, as the fashion-buying public has now been convinced to accept substandard craftsmanship as the ideal. Recent victims of the Prada “joke” are Nicole Kidman (who desperately needs my fashion guidance) and Natalie Imbruglia. Most awards shows will feature some misguided soul in a glaring example.
Speaking of misguided souls and awards shows, can we talk about Joan Rivers? What exactly is her problem? She used to be pretty funny but has turned into a Zsa Zsa Gabor-like caricature of herself. It was my appreciation of her humor that made me excited when she started being the pre-show commentator for E! Television’s coverage of the Oscars. But over the past few years, she has shown herself to be little more than a crotchety old harridan who dresses like a drag queen. Her narrow vision of what is appropriate formal wear, especially for men, eclipses even her own disastrous mid-Eighties taste, and E!, who leads the race in fashion coverage, should replace this woman with someone like Isaac Mizrahi, who could probably use a job right now.
THE RAVE Target. Yes, Target. Their slick high-fashion ads that showcase their low-end, mass-market merchandise as if it were all by Ralph Lauren are a scream. The placement of these ads in the premier fashion magazines is what makes this marketing ploy so interesting, based on the theory that even fashion-conscious people don’t want to pay a lot of money for the most basic items. The newest ad, in New York Magazine‘s Fall Fashion Preview, shows a fully made-up model in a plain $19.99 black sweater, and her hair is in rollers. Little paint rollers, to be exact, at $3.99 each. Witty, sarcastic, and self-deprecating, they not only showcase unrelated products cleverly, but after looking at page after page of $1,500 coats, $900 dresses, and $200 jeans, Target’s little black sweater at $19.99 is as cute as anything in there.
I COVER THE STOREFRONT Charlotte Russe (Lakeline and Highland malls) has the flashiest, trashiest, and trendiest clothes at great prices. Lots of glitter, feathers, and chiffon, all starting at $19.99 for party dresses and accessories that are sure to get a workout this holiday season, even Halloween. It’s movie queen glamour on a budget, and isn’t that what we need most in life right now? The stretch PVC collection is tarty and fun, and dirt cheap to boot. Lots of black, but no one seems to get tired of that.
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This article appears in September 10 • 1999.