You didn’t think we’d leave you hangin’ did you? We’ve been kicking it live each week since the Drag Race began and now we’re at the end of the road. Sad, but true. Especially sad because most in the room felt Nina Flowers was robbed. But you know, Bebe Zahara Benet wasn’t that bad of a choice either!
For the FINALANZA EXTRAVAGANZA we have the always inimitable Claudette Murphree (Claudine the Machine, as her ex-lovers call her); The inspired performer behind Rebecca Havemeyer and Cristeene Vale, Mr. Paul Soileau; queer country song stylist and wonderlusty lover of subtlety, Abi Tapia; Unicorn headband-wearing cute-as-a-three-dollar-bill Bettysoo; Lesbatronic-animatronic Felice Triragoff; the eye behind the camera PJ Raval; and your gay place heroines Ash Bell and Andy Campbell (that’s right bitches, it’s a tag team effort!).
Quit hemming and hawing and read what the judges had to say about this HSM of a show…
Paul:
The fear of a powerful gender illusionist has been forecast across the nation on RuPaul’s season finale of Drag Race. The powerhouse that is Nina Flowers proved herself the master of illusion and reincarnation every week, and her reward is that her fame is untainted by a tawdry contract of tacky sunglasses, cheap endorsements, and stank celebrity. May she rise to the heavens of the queer fantasy, and continue to inspire the worthy.
Abi Tapia:
I, like RuPaul, was entranced by Rebecca’s beauty, but even under her spell, I could see that she was amateur compared to Bebe and Nina. Nina was the sweetest, most fierce and exciting, but I still like Bebe and I think she’ll do a great job wearing the crown. That big, papal rhinestone crown.
Bettysoo:
Befitting my title, I was very taken with the giant tiara. Probably the most phallic tiara ever. I loved Nina best, especially for her character and generous spirit. But Bebe was a close, close second. Mostly, I was just relieved Rebecca didn’t win. Is that mean? Well, it’s true.
Claudette:
What can I say? RuPaul, you better WORK hard on avoiding me on Wednesday night. I have no idea why Nina was not crowned the ONE, but it’s OK because contractually, Nina is most likely more free. But if Nina’s on the Absolut tour I may make it, because my love is true. And if there a reunion show….I’d love to see the ladies let into Rebecca one more time… please, Logo, do a Bravo-style post-season cast tell-all on the couch. And Nina, Seriously, Loca, Call Me, Por Favor.
Felice:
Insert pouty face here. RuPaul, my fist and your face have a date Wednesday night at Kiss and Fly. I am going to go Xena Warrior Princess on your ass and to defend the honor of not only my beloved Ongina but now for my beacon of sunshine Nina Flowers. The only solace for my grief: Seeing Rebecca’s face drop when RuPaul told her to sashay away.
PJ:
What a finale. A Bebe vs Nina showdown! Though hard to focus on the drag extravaganza when the whole time I was distracted wondering what the hell Rebecca Glasscock was doing in the final three. Someone explain it to me, please. Let’s be honest, Rebecca Glasscock is the Wendy Pepper of Drag Race (in reference to season one Project Runway, for the TV illiterate) – untalented, personality-lacking, insecurity-fueled blandness which apparently makes for more accessible TV. Imagine a final three with Ongina substituting for Rebecca Glasscock – worth a thesis dissertation for sure. Though I do love Bebe, I have to admit I was rooting for Nina Flowers who I think would bring drag to a whole new 4th dimension. A Road Warrior queer punk Puerto Rican dimension. Ah yeah. But I think what was most fitting was after the finale flipping channels and stumbling upon a Golden Girls episode with Blanche and Rose dressed in cat outfits. The original Drag Race.
Ash:
Oh RuPaul, much like your illegitimate love child Tyra, you have disappointed me. Going for the obvious self-aggrandizing choice? Soooooo Tyra. In the race for the heir to the drag throne Ru, or the producers, depending on your thoughts on reality TV, chose someone quite similar to Ru herself. Frustrating! Especially when there were so many more interesting options: Ongina, Tammy Brown, and the amazingly Earth shattering Nina Flowers. I agree with my fabulous co-watchers there were better contenders, but Bebe is definitely a safe, solid choice.
Andy:
If I ruled the drag rule, it would have been a walk-off between Nina Flowers, Tammy Brown and Ongina. Damn those kids are making me GAG! I agree with Paul on this one, Rupaul’s show could have been a platform for the avant-garde queens instead of a dog and pony show of humdrum and pedestrian queens (three above excepted). Mostly I was annoyed by the end, although it was more satisfying than the L-Word finale, but then again, what isn’t? Oooooh! Snap?
This article appears in March 20 • 2009.