In honor of Johnny Torrez, who passed away on Feb. 14, 2001, we asked local comedians to tell us their favorite joke from the vast arsenal of the “Commissioner of Comedy.”
Kerry Awn
“You know what I like in a woman? … Me!”
Angela Davis
“At the store they asked me, ‘Do you want paper or plastic?’ In other words, do you want to kill a tree or choke a fish ? … Why don’t you just hollow out a dolphin for me?”
Howard Beecher
“Johnny used to tell me, ‘Howard, let me give you some advice on the comedy business … Quit!'”
Nancy Reed
“Johnny Torrez’s family crest of arms. It was two joints crossed, with a pair of jumper cables going around them. At the top it said, ‘An indictment is not a conviction,’ and at the bottom it said, ‘God bless the appellate court.'”
John O’Connell
“This guy asks me, ‘Johnny, where were you when Kennedy was shot?’ Talk about a thorough investigation!”
This article appears in February 23 • 2001.