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the luv doc archives 452 results

That Extra Syllable Is a Huuuge Time-Waster

The patient gentility of the anagram ASAP

Tue., May 15, 2012

Italian Boyfriends and Perky, Bleach-Blonde Updos

In the real world of the 99-percenter, however, moral questions are rarely black-and-white

Tue., May 8, 2012

The Stockholm Syndrome

Volleyball: Seriously, it’s like a crowded game of badminton with a huge, unfeathered cock

Wed., May 2, 2012

The Mind-Numbing Hell of Child-Oriented Places

For aeons, child rearing was just a begrudging afterthought, and somehow humanity managed to march forward

Wed., April 25, 2012

Bikinis, Banana Hammocks, and Baby Oil

You can never be overdressed or overeducated

Tue., April 17, 2012

Stop Talking About Your Workout. Forever.

A great body doesn’t make you interesting, it just makes your dullness slightly more tolerable.

Tue., April 10, 2012

Parachute Pants and a Kentucky Waterfall

A miniature pony is an even awesomer chick magnet than an IROC-Z

Tue., April 3, 2012

Insufferable Narcissists

Just the act of procreative sex is an undertaking of considerable hubris.

Mon., March 26, 2012

Friends

Dear Luv Doc, Last week, my friend from St. Louis – who I said could come stay with me during...

Tue., March 20, 2012

Texas Film Hall of Fame

There is a lot of anxiety among the townies about being properly credentialed during South by Southwest, and rightfully so....

Tue., March 13, 2012

TechNERDphilia

Here’s a quick rundown of dope shit at this year’s South by Southwest Interactive festival. If you ain’t got a...

Wed., March 7, 2012

Organic Gardening

Dear Luv Doc, A few weeks ago, my husband and I put a small vegetable garden in our backyard –...

Tue., Feb. 28, 2012

Toftation Island

Chronicle parties nearly always degenerate into depraved, drug-swilling freak shows that last into the wee hours. On the one hand,...

Tue., Feb. 21, 2012

The Jaw-Dropping Hammer of Thor

Dear Luv Doc, A few nights ago, I had a dream that I was getting coffee at Spider House, and...

Wed., Feb. 15, 2012

Teenage Drifters and Truck Stop Prostitutes

Dear Luv Doc, Whenever I buy Neapolitan ice cream, my roommate eats the chocolate and leaves the vanilla and strawberry....

Mon., Feb. 6, 2012

A Resurgence of Quality Programming

Dear Doc: In these exciting times, I often wonder: Why haven't we seen a resurgence of quality programming like Battle...

Tue., Jan. 31, 2012

It's Called Priapism

What does the doctor do to you if you have a hard-on for more than four hours after taking Viagra?...

Mon., Jan. 23, 2012

What Next: Truck Taint?

Dear Luvdoc, My husband recently got himself a pair of metallic truck nuts and hung them on the back of...

Mon., Jan. 16, 2012

A Mind-Boggling Variety of Sensory Input

Dear Luvdoc, Why is the sky blue? – Gerald. Wow Gerald. Maybe you should instead ask yourself why you don't...

Wed., Jan. 11, 2012

Carpool Etiquette

Luvdoc, Ever since my boss learned we live on the same side of town, he keeps asking to ride home...

Wed., Jan. 4, 2012

NYE 1977

Saturday night begins the year of the Mayan apocalypse. Time to get your ducks in a row … just in...

Wed., Dec. 28, 2011

Africa Night With Zoumountchi

This year the Lord's Day is on the Lord's Day – that being Lord Jr. and Lord Sr., respectively, who...

Wed., Dec. 21, 2011

Jeff Hughes & Chaparral

If you're too cool to dance country, you're living in the wrong burg. Pull that stick out and relax, Slick....

Wed., Dec. 14, 2011

Cherrywood Art Fair 10th Anniversary

No matter what Jesus said, Christmas is no time to jump off the materialism bandwagon. You may think you're doing...

Wed., Dec. 7, 2011

Fleetwood Mac Hoot Night

Like Joe Paterno jokes, Christmas is just … too soon. Yeah, yeah, broken record. Every year the schmaltz piles thicker...

Wed., Nov. 30, 2011

A 'Hole' Bunch of Thanks With Chris Brecht & Dead Flowers

Well, well, well … what have we to be thankful for? Yes, the world economy's in the toilet, drought and...

Tue., Nov. 22, 2011

East Austin Studio Tour

Any artist who can afford a studio in East Austin must be doing pretty well, right? Those digs ain't cheap....

Wed., Nov. 16, 2011

Sims Benefit Bash

If you're a 99 Percenter (and there's about a 99% chance that you are), here's a little secret: You didn't...

Tue., Nov. 8, 2011

Austin Tequila Fest

If you've ever woken up shirtless with your pants around your ankles, upside down in a stranger's bathtub with a...

Wed., Nov. 2, 2011

Zombie Ball: The Party To Die For

Put your costume on now. It's go time. It already was last weekend but maybe you didn't get the memo....

Wed., Oct. 26, 2011

Gypsy Picnic Trailer Food Festival

First of all, if you're offended by the term "gypsy," back off. It ain't like that. Here in Austin we...

Tue., Oct. 18, 2011

Second Annual Freak Show Festival

Well now that we've had some rain, there's not much to bitch about anymore except the economy. Have at it....

Wed., Oct. 12, 2011

Central Texas Paranormal Conference

New bumper sticker: Keep Austin Paranormal. That's pretty close to weird, isn't it? OK, so maybe not in a dreads-and-tie-dye...

Wed., Oct. 5, 2011

Gagarazzi: A Lady Gaga Burlesque and Variety Show

Time to head down to the butcher shop so you can start putting your costume together. Meat is fairly expensive,...

Wed., Sept. 28, 2011

Queensr˙che

You may be one of those whippersnappers whose image of the Eighties looks a lot like Arnold's Drive-In: Richie, Potsie,...

Wed., Sept. 21, 2011

Austin Corn Lovers Fiesta

One thing's for certain: Dyslexia is a hibtc. Words are hard enough to understand without having to play a game...

Wed., Sept. 14, 2011

Alamo Drafhouse & Parkside Present: Rolling Roadshow - 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off'

If you saw Ferris Bueller's Day Off during its opening run, your tattoos are probably green. Wait a minute …...

Wed., Sept. 7, 2011

Out of Bounds Comedy Festival

How much comedy can anyone truly take? That's a very serious question, isn't it? The mere prospect of six or...

Wed., Aug. 31, 2011

2011 'Austin Chronicle' Hot Sauce Festival

The 2011 Austin Chronicle Hot Sauce Festival is this Sunday at Waterloo Park. That's all you really need to know....

Wed., Aug. 24, 2011

Red Hot Patriot: The Kick-Ass Wit of Molly Ivins

Yes, it was Molly Ivins who invented the nickname "Gov. Goodhair" for Rick Perry. That single instance of wickedly brilliant...

Wed., Aug. 17, 2011

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