Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights

Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights seems to be fashioned around the idea of making fun of as many body parts as possible -- no matter where their location. Thus, in addition to the fart and boob jokes that have now become commonplace in almost all PG-13 movies, this Sandler cartoon ups the ante by farting at Christmas carolers and gratuitously including a three-breasted woman. And the body-humor jokes don't stop there. Eight Smutty Nights also features pint-sized characters with mismatched feet, a Porta Potti catastrophe, car humping and swatting, and more. And the constant references to underarm hair, jockstraps, butt cracks, tongue kissing, morning erections, wedgies, baldness, manure, snot, seizures, and whizzes, to name but a few, practically defy the movie's brief running time of 70 minutes. It must set some new kind of record, although it's a dubious distinction indeed. When coupled with the movie's mean-spirited sentiments and abundant commercial plugs, these eight nights stretch out into what feels like a lifetime in hell. Viewers expecting a Jewish-focused holiday cartoon à la The Rugrats will be disappointed, too, as the movie has very little Chanukah-related content, and what is there is swept up into a generalized holiday-season guise rather than anything denominationally specific. And if you were expecting to hear Sandler's genuinely funny “Chanukah Song” – and who wouldn't, since its presence is promoted in the film's ads – you'll have to sit all the way through the closing credits, since that's the only time the song appears, and its new lyrics are not as good. Otherwise, the movie's frequent songs are a complete joke, with tunes and rhyme schemes that mock the idea of craft and fine-tuning. Sandler voices the two leading male characters: the dour jerk Davey Stone and the kindly basketball coach Whitey Duvall. (Sandler also voices Whitey's sister Eleanore.) Despite being the town asshole, Davey Stone's emotional troubles are explained away in a bathetic background story about his dead parents. Certain to be distasteful to children and adults alike, Eight Crazy Nights is a total misfire.