https://www.austinchronicle.com/daily/chronolog/2012-07-06/up-too-early/

Up Too Early

By The Luv Doc, July 6, 2012, 7:00am, Chronolog

My, what a rich bouquet of fashion so early in the morning. That Kelly green backpack is such sweet eye candy it's hard to focus anything else in this picture. You can't find that kind of swag in retail outlets. You have to go the distance. You have to work in a boring vintage shop or maybe mug a leprechaun.

You don't just stumble across a Kelly Green backpack in the dollar bin at Wal-Mart ... or maybe you do.

Regardless, it's nicely paired with this fellow's vintage 10-speed. Yeah, notice I didn't say "road bike" or "hybrid" or "racer" ... none of that Lance Armstrong spandex nut-hugger shit. This bike is made of Chinese pig iron, weighs about 75 lbs, and literally only has ten speeds, 4 of which probably don't work. The nice thing about a 10-speed is you can pick one up at Goodwill for about $15 and a small hernia. They're nearly indestructible. They're the kind of bike you can throw through a plate-glass window in an emergency. And yes, those kind of emergencies happen all the time.

Really, other than those skinny jeans which he has carefully rolled up (right leg only) to avoid unsightly chain grease stains, this fellow is rolling strong. High top Chuck Taylor basketball shoes are always baller There is literally nothing you can't wear them with. Tuxedo? Check. Speedo? Check. That about covers it. They even go with skinny jeans, but here's the thing: They go unwillingly. Skinny jeans are heroin chic and heroin addicts don't really have the energy to pull them on or off, as it were, much less lace up a pair of high top Chuck Taylors.

Luvdoc Fashion Index: 8.0 (because somebody needs to take his pants to Buffalo Exchange)