Mister Smarty Pants Knows

"...enzyme, glutathione S-transferase, which appears to protect people against damage from cancer-causing chemicals...."

May 22, 1998 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...Jamaican ginger root. Drinking it resulted in nervous system damage, causing "jake leg," a twitching of the legs...."

Oct. 13, 1995 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...carbon dioxide, equivalent to about 50 cents in climate damage...."

Aug. 18, 2023 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...A large bite of food could actually cause brain damage...."

June 4, 2021 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...squid's brain, a large bite of food could actually damage it...."

Aug. 24, 2018 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...Wild boars are responsible for $1.5 billion in damage and cost controls annually, according to a study by..."

July 6, 2018 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...period, Romanesque as well as Gothic, ultimately suffered catastrophic damage and collapse...."

June 8, 2018 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...game may lead to significant recovery of sight following damage to visual centers of the brain...."

May 17, 2013 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

Well, where else are we supposed to play 'Bejeweled'?

"...more than one in seven iPhone 4 owners will damage their phone within the first year, the highest rate..."

April 13, 2012 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

Cough remedies, lionfish, defenestration, and more

"...broken aquarium near Biscayne Bay, Fla., escaped due to damage from Hurricane Andrew. As a result of their release..."

Nov. 6, 2009 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

Accuracy of the musical memory, Lincoln questions the divinity of Christ, and more

"...burned it, when his friends warned him it would damage his career...."

Feb. 27, 2009 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

Whale puke, George Costanza, coffee – the miracle drug, and more

"...may cut the risk of dementia by blocking the damage cholesterol can inflict on the body...."

May 16, 2008 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

We have mo bananas today

"...it takes 175 hours and $800 to repair the damage caused by a single case of identity theft...."

April 21, 2006 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

"...shift their sunlight-absorbing chloroplast organs away to protect against damage...."

Jan. 17, 2003 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants

"...To damage our ozone layer, a star would have to go..."

Jan. 10, 2003 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Mr. Smarty Pants

"...500,000 earthquakes per year, only about 100 cause any damage...."

Dec. 22, 2000 Column by Mr. Smarty Pants

Back in wax

Back in wax

"...the Happen-Ins are off to a promising start. Austin's Damage Pants, likewise, bulldozes through its eponymous wax LP, released..."

March 5, 2010 Music Review by Austin Powell

Thank You, Central Time Zone: A Preview of the 2007 NFL Draft

"...a multitude of reasons. I don’t like to wear pants (this is cut-off country). I like my food to..."

April 26, 2007 Sports Post by Timothy Braun

Blake Sandberg: Resident Alien

Label head and musical Alien Blake Sandberg insists he's an earthling.

"...and Daniel Johnston to the raw punk of locals Damage Pants and Aliens, Misc. Music is the mothership for..."

July 25, 2008 Music Feature by Doug Freeman

On the Fringe

"...Austin, as evidenced by a recent 28-song sampler featuring Damage Pants, Lazar Wolf, and Danny & the Nightmares, among..."

Oct. 19, 2007 Music Feature by Austin Powell

Off the Record

Remembering blues drummer 'Uncle' John Turner, tracking the devil and Daniel Johnston, on-air with Seattle's KEXP, Abandoned Love Records, and more

"...due to conflicting arrangements. Fair, Aliens, Lazar Wolf, and Damage Pants will perform as scheduled. 'Uncle' John Turner, 1944-2007..."

Aug. 3, 2007 Music Column by Austin Powell

Postmarks

Our readers talk back.

"...him, and convinced Motorola to undo some of the damage done by Motorola's move into the watershed in the..."

July 1, 2005 Column

Sxsw

"...EURIPIDES PANTS: A band cannot live on schmaltz alone. Euripides Pants..."

March 14, 1997 Music Feature

Postmarks

Our readers talk back.

"...Mr. Not-So-Smarty Pants..."

Jan. 24, 2003 Column

Public Notice

From race riots in South Florida to the MLK Day March in Austin, "Public Notice" reflects on how far we've come and how far we've yet to go.

"...Blackie was the icebreaker, of course, with his eager pants and wagging tail and sweet-smelling, freshly scrubbed coat, black..."

Jan. 12, 2001 Column by Kate X Messer

Postmarks

Our readers talk back.

"...Mr. Smarty Pants Wrong on Dallas Texans..."

Jan. 2, 2004 Column

Dancing About Architecture

"...security will be tight; just imagine the kind of damage that that rascally woodpecker could do to the Bushes......"

June 30, 1995 Music Column by Ken Lieck

The Eighth Street Survivors

They came out to protest police brutality. They were met by a life-altering wave of police violence. Eight months later, they still await justice and change.

"...brother's condition: His skull was fractured, he had brain damage, and doctors had placed him on a ventilator...."

Feb. 5, 2021 News Feature by Brant Bingamon

Who Killed Vicki Nisbett? And Is She Even Dead?

No verifiable crime scene, no murder weapon, no motive, and no body

"...left the apartment wearing a black jacket and black pants. He later hinted that Vicki may have run off..."

Jan. 27, 2017 News Feature by Chase Hoffberger

Lake of Fire

Meat Puppets, Chapter 3: Curt and Cris Kirkwood, reunited, and it feels so good

"...own filth, the atrophy of the needle and the damage done...."

July 20, 2007 Music Feature by Doug Freeman

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