Going Off the Gridiron

Avoiding the Super Bowl


Top Gun

Super Bowl Sunday is right around the corner, with Eagles and Patriots fans everywhere preparing for the big day. Fortunately for those disinterested in watching CTE develop in real-time, there are a host of alternatives this upcoming Sunday, from gore-filled horror to adorable puppies.

Top Gun and the Super Bowl have a lot in common. Both are exceedingly macho, have exciting moments of action, and breaks for music. However, only one of them has Tom Cruise flying a fighter jet upside down, and the greatest high five in cinematic history. The 1986 military drama gets a flashback brunch (Alamo Ritz, 12:30pm), then stick around for a film with just as much cheerleading as the Super Bowl, Bring It On (Alamo Ritz, 3:30pm).

Some people don't watch the game, and just tune in for the halftime show. For those who want to skip the football and get straight to the songs, there's music galore at the Moulin Rouge! Movie Party (Alamo Lakeline, 4pm). Don't forget to stretch before the can-can competition.

That has the preshow covered. Now, for the game itself. If you are a fan of violence, but hate keeping track of the score, then horror movie lovers Blood Over Texas has you covered (with gore) with their second annual Slaughter Bowl (Alamo South Lamar, 7pm). There will of course be food, beverages, games and trivia, as well as 2010 horror comedy film Tucker & Dale vs. Evil.

And if you can't be bothered to leave the couch, there are always the Puppy Bowl and Kitten Bowl. If you've never heard of it, just imagine the Super Bowl but instead of Eagles and Patriots it's more like "Be-eagles" and "Paw-triots." You can catch Kitten Bowl V at 11am on the Hallmark Channel and Puppy Bowl XIV at 2pm on Animal Planet.

A note to readers: Bold and uncensored, The Austin Chronicle has been Austin’s independent news source for almost 40 years, expressing the community’s political and environmental concerns and supporting its active cultural scene. Now more than ever, we need your support to continue supplying Austin with independent, free press. If real news is important to you, please consider making a donation of $5, $10 or whatever you can afford, to help keep our journalism on stands.

Support the Chronicle  

READ MORE
More by Milo Webb
LBJ Library Celebrates Fight for Equality in American Sports
LBJ Library Celebrates Fight for Equality in American Sports
The “Get in the Game” exhibition’s opening ceremony is April 21

April 18, 2018

Overwatch League's Houston Outlaws Get Warm Welcome
Overwatch League's Houston Outlaws Get Warm Welcome
E-sports squad preps for next season surrounded by local fans

April 2, 2018

KEYWORDS FOR THIS STORY

Super Bowl Sunday, Moulin Rouge!, Bring It On, Top Gun, Tucker & Dale vs. Evil

MORE IN THE ARCHIVES
NEWSLETTERS
One click gets you all the newsletters listed below

Breaking news, arts coverage, and daily events

Can't keep up with happenings around town? We can help.

Austin's queerest news and events

New recipes and food news delivered Mondays

Eric Goodman's Austin FC column, other soccer news

Information is power. Support the free press, so we can support Austin.   Support the Chronicle