Politics Gift Guide
Self-Defense From the 84th Legislature
They're baaack!!! (Or will be, come January.) Although a concealed-carry permit (with or without loaded accessory) allows you to dodge the metal detector line, we don't recommend weapons in the gallery. What you will instead need on occasion is something to eliminate the bloviage emanating from the floor. Hughes Enterprises offers a wide range of ear protection, although they advertise by the gross. You could instead stop by a pharmacy en route to the Dome – or save up for a spring filibuster with all your friends. Case (360 pairs) of classic earplugs: $104.27. – Michael King
Why Buy the Milk When You Can Give the Cow?
It's a gift that keeps on giving and giving and ... Heifer International connects poverty-stricken communities across the globe with sustainable agriculture, partnering them with animals – cows, water buffalo, llamas – that produce enough food (like milk, eggs, and honey) to both consume and be sold at market. And the program's "passing on the gift" model means the first female offspring of a family's livestock is given to another family, ensuring the resources don't stop at one home. The Heifer Project has been meaningfully helping families rise above poverty and hunger for seven decades, and this year you can be part of it starting at $10. – Mary Tuma
Survive Nuclear Holocaust
Make sure the ones you love are well-prepared for the coming Armageddon with a complete Nuclear and Radiation Family Survival Kit, available at the InfoWars online store. Each kit includes five Radstickers, four packs of FDA-approved ThyroSafe Potassium Iodide Tablets, four Readi Masks, the HazardPak Digital Survival Library on DVD-ROM, and a book, helpfully titled Nuclear War Survival Skills. Nothing says "Money is no object when I can waste it" like spending $149.95 (plus tax and shipping and handling) on "peel and seal" face masks, a DVD, and stickers that change color when exposed to radiation. – Amy Kamp
Holiday Cheer at the Capitol
Two ways to brighten the holidays around the Legislature. This year's official Texas Capitol Ornament ($20) is modeled on the blue oculus windows that surround the dome. Alternatively, you can make a wish come true for a kid in Child Protective Services. Choose a wish list gift tag from the Angel Tree in front of the Capitol Grill in the underground extension, buy the present, and drop it at the Speaker's Office before Dec. 12. – Richard Whittaker
Click here for Part 1 of our Politics Gift Guide.