Hightower Report: Why Is It So Dark at This Time of Year?

It's scary to see so many 5-watt bulbs in 100-watt sockets

The moon sinks low on the horizon, as if it's trying to hide. Frightened animals flee into the woods, even though nothing seems to be chasing them. Nature has turned topsy-turvy. It can mean only one thing: The Legislature is back in session.

I've seen enough state legislatures in action – Michigan, for example, Florida, and, of course, Wisconsin – to know that our Texas bunch doesn't have a lock on lunacy, but we certainly have more than our share of loco lawmakers. Take George Lavender. Yes, please.

This right-wing peer of the lower chamber became a hero of the kooky caucus in 2011 by sponsoring and passing a bill intended to save us Texans from an unspeakable horror: energy-efficient lightbulbs. Because of a 2007 federal law (enacted by that notorious lefty president George W. Bush), lightbulbmakers were required to produce high-efficiency bulbs to replace the old energy suckers.

Over my dead body, cried Lavender! It was his Alamo moment, as he rose in defense of the holy right of Texans to waste as much energy as we damn well please. To counteract the big bad feds' outrageous attempt to save energy for America and save money for consumers, Laven­der's law invited bulbmakers to set up shop here and freely produce the old-style, high-wattage bulbs. Where else but Texas? Imagine how proud Davy Crockett would be to know that he died to make this possible.

Unfortunately for Lavender, major bulbmakers were already profiting from the burgeoning conservation market, so they had no interest in going backward. "The most disappointing thing to me," Lavender now says dimly, "is that we haven't found anyone willing to put in a plant."

And that's why the moon hides and animals flee when legislatures convene – it's scary to see so many 5-watt bulbs sitting in 100-watt sockets.


For more information on Jim Hightower's work – and to subscribe to his award-winning monthly newsletter, "The Hightower Lowdown" – visit www.jimhightower.com. You can hear his radio commentaries on KOOP Radio 91.7FM, weekdays at 10:58am and 12:58pm.

For more information on Jim Hightower's work – and to subscribe to his award-winning monthly newsletter, The Hightower Lowdown – visit www.jimhightower.com. You can hear his radio commentaries on KOOP Radio, 91.7FM, weekdays at 10:58am and 12:58pm.

Got something to say on the subject? Send a letter to the editor.

A note to readers: Bold and uncensored, The Austin Chronicle has been Austin’s independent news source for over 40 years, expressing the community’s political and environmental concerns and supporting its active cultural scene. Now more than ever, we need your support to continue supplying Austin with independent, free press. If real news is important to you, please consider making a donation of $5, $10 or whatever you can afford, to help keep our journalism on stands.

Support the Chronicle  

READ MORE
More legislature
Lege, Statewide, and Beyond
Lege, Statewide, and Beyond
What does Trump's toxicity mean for downballot races?

Richard Whittaker, Aug. 26, 2016

Belt-Tightening Season for State Agencies
Belt-Tightening Season for State Agencies
State leaders announce budget cuts

Richard Whittaker, July 8, 2016

More The Hightower Report
The Hightower Report
The Hightower Report
The Donald Show

Jim Hightower, July 10, 2015

The Hightower Report
The Hightower Report
The damning nuttiness of the GOP's "Hell No" faction

Jim Hightower, Aug. 15, 2014

KEYWORDS FOR THIS STORY

legislature, lege, George Lavender, George W. Bush, energy, lightbulbs, energy efficiency

MORE IN THE ARCHIVES
One click gets you all the newsletters listed below

Breaking news, arts coverage, and daily events

Keep up with happenings around town

Kevin Curtin's bimonthly cannabis musings

Austin's queerest news and events

Eric Goodman's Austin FC column, other soccer news

Information is power. Support the free press, so we can support Austin.   Support the Chronicle