News, Sports, Talk, etc.
STREET BEAT Downtown Austin, especially Red River, is in the middle of a crime wave, so learn where your rental car has the least chance of being broken into. Also, nonwhites: Don't piss off our cops. They don't like you but do love their fancy new Taser guns.
TRAFFIC JAMS Austin has arguably the worst drivers in North America, who in fact once inspired Spoon's Britt Daniel to write "Idiot Driver." Watch for the other guy, because he ain't watching for you.
KEEP AUSTIN BREATHING Sorry Euros, smoking in local bars is now illegal. Luckily, the more crowded a place is, the less likely they are to care.
BLEEDING BURNT ORANGE Attention maroon-clad guests from Southern California: NATIONAL CHAMPIONS, BABY!!! We promise not to lord it over you too much, mainly because we'll be watching our Longhorns go for the baseball-football-basketball trifecta in this week's NCAA tournament.
WHEELS ON FIRE Both Austin Roller Derby leagues hit the track (and maybe each other) this week: banked babes the Lonestar Rollergirls Thursday and Sunday evenings at the Austin Convention Center, and the flat-track national champion Texas Rollergirls Saturday afternoon at the Austin Music Hall, with special guests the Motels.
SXSW PARTY CHATTER Find out where Jane's Addiction, Flaming Lips, Beastie Boys, the Strokes, My Chemical Romance, Wu-Tang Clan, and Gang of Four have their "surprise" shows. Or just read our Chronicle dailies. See ya there!
A note to readers: Bold and uncensored, The Austin Chronicle has been Austin’s independent news source for almost 40 years, expressing the community’s political and environmental concerns and supporting its active cultural scene. Now more than ever, we need your support to continue supplying Austin with independent, free press. If real news is important to you, please consider making a donation of $5, $10 or whatever you can afford, to help keep our journalism on stands.
Support the Chronicle