Second Helpings: Fast Food Nation
Fri., Jan. 10, 2003
Burger King
Various locations/various hours (late-night drive-through at some locations)If you're cruising for flame-kissed meat but you don't have time to get out of the car, Burger King is the place. The Whopper starts with an all-beef patty that is carefully charbroiled on a slow-moving conveyor belt. Additional flavor comes from freshly sliced tomatoes and onions, along with a sublime concert of ketchup and mayonnaise slathered across the bun. Burger King's "taste-test-winning" fries are disappointing when not straight out of the fryer, but you can always try their passable extra-crispy onion rings instead.
Wendy's
Various locations/various hours (late-night drive-through at all Austin locations)Although the food quality at Wendy's has suffered somewhat since its feisty upstart days in the Seventies, it's still the best and most innovative of the Big Three national burger chains. Much to the late Clara Peller's chagrin, the Big Bacon Classic overwhelms you with bacon, cheese, and onions to a point where you almost forget about the beef. Wendy's line of chicken sandwiches is superlative, and their fries are better than McDonalds' in many people's minds. More health-conscious folks might steer toward a baked potato or salad, but be prepared to be derailed by the delicious, spoon-thick Frosty dairy dessert.
KFC (aka Kentucky Fried Chicken)
Various locations/various hoursYou could get better fried chicken, but sometimes only the Colonel's secret blend of 11 herbs and spices will do. KFC's unique Original Recipe combines old-fashioned saltiness with a slight undertow of zesty zip that is revered from Korea to Kuwait. Often paired with WingWorks these days, fried chicken is no longer your only option at KFC. Buffalo wings or a Roasted Chicken Sandwich are available when you're not in the mood for a bucket of deep-fried food. Or if you just want a smaller version, go for the Jason Alexander-endorsed Popcorn Chicken. Notable side dishes include perfectly consistent mashed potatoes with mellow brown gravy and succulent corn on the cob that comes complete with a stick for easy, one-handed eating.
Jack in the Box
Various locations/various hours (many locations open 24 hours)Although Jack in the Box is known as a burger place, the most infamous item on their menu is the deep-fried taco, two of which can be had for just 99 cents. A lot of people put down the Box's unique mix of spicy meat paste, lettuce, cheese, and hot sauce all wrapped up in a corn tortilla transparent with grease, but you'll miss them if you venture too far east, which Jack in the Box has yet to do. No fast food item goes better with cheap beer. The Sourdough Jack Bacon Cheeseburger is another menu highlight.
Taco Cabana
Various locations/various hours (Many locations 24 hours)San Antonio-based Taco Cabana brought the combo-plate aesthetic of Tex-Mex to the fast food arena. Although the drive-through waits are almost unbearable in the late-night hours, oft-inebriated revelers jonesing for enchiladas, fajitas, and breakfast tacos line up anyway. Taco Cabana's fresh flour tortillas are good enough to eat alone, so don't throw away any extras. If you're inside, be sure to go hog wild at the extensive condiment bar. All the salsa, pico de gallo, chopped onion, and cilantro you can carry is available free of charge.
Sonic
Various locations/various hoursIn small towns across America, cruising around the Sonic drive-in is a Friday night rite for the youngsters. Sonic's urban locations aren't exactly hotbeds of action, but you can enjoy oldies radio through tinny loudspeakers as modern-day carhops bedazzle you with fast food's finest array of fountain drinks, minus the roller skates. The shakes and malts taste almost hand-dipped, and a Route 44-sized limeade is just the ticket for caffeine-free thirst quenching. Foodwise, Sonic's foot-long chili cheese dog (onions on request) with a side of piping-hot tater tots is always a good bet.
Schlotzsky's
Various locations/various hoursThis Austin-based sandwich concern makes excellent turkey and pastrami sandwiches, but the Original is Schlotzsky's true standout. I happen to despise black olives, but I'll eat them happily if they're part of the three-meat, three-cheese masterpiece that is the Original. Add a few dashes of the in-house Louisiana-style hot sauce for extra spice, and don't forget to try Schlotzsky's better-than-average deli-style potato chips on the side.