The Coral Snake
Some Modest Problem-Solving Ideas
RECEIVED Tue., Jan. 18, 2011
Dear Editor,
By now, it should be painfully obvious to all fair-minded citizens that our uniquely American experiment with representative democracy, although ideal in principle, has foundered in practice. Our present form of government is too inefficient, expensive, and divisive to function in any meaningful way. Frankly, most citizens would rather watch football games than waste their time and money on politics.
The obvious alternative to such a “messy” form of government is the corporate model which has served this country so well, notwithstanding a few minor economic upheavals which are expected in a free market economy. We should unite in proposing that Congress outsource all governmental functions to a new holding company, which would apply modern business practices to all aspects of governance. The new corporation could be named U.S.A. Management, Incorporated.
Benefits offered by this new form of government would include elimination of costly elections and useless programs, such as Social Security and Medicare. Since USAMI would operate on the profit principle, deficits would become a thing of the past.
The Board of Directors would be chosen by the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, which already represents the best interests of all Americans. Thus the invisible hand of Adam Smith would bring efficiency and profitability to a faltering enterprise.
Once this magnificent corporate structure is in place, costly “branches of government” such as Congress and the Supreme Court could be eliminated. Since the board would make all state decisions, the enactment of laws and the construction of same would be unnecessary. Binding arbitration would be the sole method of dispute resolution. Trial by jury would become a useless appendage of an inefficient system, and therefore discarded.
The presidency, board-appointed, would be retained for ceremonial purposes.
Let’s get behind this, folks!
By now, it should be painfully obvious to all fair-minded citizens that our uniquely American experiment with representative democracy, although ideal in principle, has foundered in practice. Our present form of government is too inefficient, expensive, and divisive to function in any meaningful way. Frankly, most citizens would rather watch football games than waste their time and money on politics.
The obvious alternative to such a “messy” form of government is the corporate model which has served this country so well, notwithstanding a few minor economic upheavals which are expected in a free market economy. We should unite in proposing that Congress outsource all governmental functions to a new holding company, which would apply modern business practices to all aspects of governance. The new corporation could be named U.S.A. Management, Incorporated.
Benefits offered by this new form of government would include elimination of costly elections and useless programs, such as Social Security and Medicare. Since USAMI would operate on the profit principle, deficits would become a thing of the past.
The Board of Directors would be chosen by the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, which already represents the best interests of all Americans. Thus the invisible hand of Adam Smith would bring efficiency and profitability to a faltering enterprise.
Once this magnificent corporate structure is in place, costly “branches of government” such as Congress and the Supreme Court could be eliminated. Since the board would make all state decisions, the enactment of laws and the construction of same would be unnecessary. Binding arbitration would be the sole method of dispute resolution. Trial by jury would become a useless appendage of an inefficient system, and therefore discarded.
The presidency, board-appointed, would be retained for ceremonial purposes.
Let’s get behind this, folks!
Lou McCreary
