TXRG Drinks It All Up

Texecutioners defeat Dairyland Dolls 144-59

Roller Derby on a Monday night? What a unique idea!

Since last night's bout, courtesy of the Texas Rollergirls and Madison's Dairyland Dolls, was intended in part as a free introduction to roller derby, the evening kicked off with a well-mannered demonstration bout.

The one-night-only free draft pitched the Elements of Destruction against the Zombie Wranglers (named in homage to two video games from the evening's sponsors, developers Frozen Codebase): The Wranglers got destroyed 27-7.

But for fans, the main event was the main attraction. It may have been put together pretty last minute, but this was a full Women's Flat Track Derby Association-sanctioned bout, between the #5 ranked Texecutioners and the #15 ranked visitors from Madison, Wi., the Dairyland Dolls. First up, as always, the visitors had to put up with some good-natured (cow-themed) Texecutioners-style ribbing.

The Dolls deserve their ranking, and no upper-ranked team in the WFTDA is a push-over, but when they spent the first nine james without getting lead jammer or any points, it was clear that the night would be an up-hill struggle.

For the longest time it looked like it would be Mouse (a fast and canny opportunist who lived up to her speedy name) who would break that duck. But Texas decided to not give her any opportunities, so it was finally Wild Berry Punch stealing a march on Rice Rocket on the 10th jam that got some points on the board. By that point, the bulk of the damage was done: with an unchallenged 45 points on the board by the end of jam nine, including a stunning triple grand slam for Sparkle Plenty and a double for Rice, Madison had to construct a giant-killing strategy.

There was no such luck in the rest of the first period, as Austin seemed content to let a few lead jammer opportunities go in favor of picking up some more grand slams, finally closing the period 75-14. But the Dairyland Dolls must have been drinking their milk at half-time, because they came straight out for blood. Well, nearly straight out, because Bloody Mary got her own grand slam in the first jam. For the next few minutes, it looked like a surprise resurgence could be on the cards: As Texas found their on-track ranks slimmed by a series of penalties, the Dolls put on 37 points in 6 jams, while Texas could only accrue 14. But then the sheer blocking power of the Texecutioners, matched by the in-team communication that has to make them a good shot for top seed going into the WFTDA Nationals in November, shut the Dolls down.

The only glitch may have come at period's end. The latest WFTDA rule set has made the change so that, rather than the final jam finishes at the end of the period, the period ends at the end of the jam – kinda like the final drive in football. The big difference is that most play in football don't go two minutes, so there was some confusion about when exactly the final whistle blew.

Not that it made much difference: Even with their second period explosion of energy, the Dolls couldn't overcome the Texecutioners, who take a 144-59 win into next weekend's Governor's Cup in Dallas.

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WFTDA, Texecutioners, Mad Rollin' Dolls, Dairyland Dolls

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