Up Too Early

Google Streetview fashion critique from Brazos Street

Somebody's feeling sassy!
Somebody's feeling sassy!

Sometimes the sidewalks of Austin can magically transform into the runways of Milan. True fashionistas know that style isn’t as much about clothes as it is about attitude, and this fellow’s attitude is sassy!

He is totally making love to the Google camera with that devil-may-care searing glance across the shoulder and his left hand poised seductively on his hip … yet thrust firmly … masculinely into his pocket like he’s fishing for a pocket knife or a church key or maybe a can of Skoal® Smokeless tobacco. After all, nothing says haute couture like a dip of snuff.

The attitude is key for his presentation, because otherwise he looks like he could be going to work at Pottery Barn or The Container Store or any number of soul-sucking generic retail establishments where khaki is part of the dress code. Lord knows we wouldn’t want to offend middle-class sensibility with racy colors like navy blue, chocolate brown or…dare I say…maroon – this isn’t Gomorrah.

This guy could totally be your golf pro or your salesperson at the ATT Store, which makes it all the more freaky that you’re kind of turned on by him. Maybe you like a peacock with no feathers. Maybe that’s your bag you sick bastard.

LuvDoc Fashion Index: 6.5 (totes generic, but plus 1.5 for the sweet muffin top)

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