The Luv Doc: Is it Creepy?

If Momoa doesn’t move your needle, you’re not just geriatric, you’re straight up dead.

The Luv Doc: Is it Creepy?

Dear Luv Doc,

I am an energetic, intelligent, creative, imaginative, resourceful, fearless woman of a certain age. I am attracted to guys who are younger than myself – most of the time. Not that I don't notice those guys out riding their Harleys with their gray freak flags flyin' ...

My question is this: Is it "creepy" to flirt with younger guys?

– Oldy but Goody


Yes, but it's equally creepy for men of a certain age to flirt with younger women and that shit happens ALL. THE. TIME. Do older dudes stop flirting with younger women? No. Are they slowing their roll due to recent high profile court cases and a healthy amount of public shaming? Yeah ... li'l bit – at least until they're a few scotches in and forget that it's not the early Eighties. You remember the early Eighties, right? Back before AIDS when ecstasy (molly to the Millies) was a couple of bucks a tab and the worst thing that could result from casual sex was herpes or a tiny little bundle of joy? Those days are of course long gone but that doesn't mean all the Uncle Ricos out there don't occasionally like to flex their leathery muscles and toss around the ol' pigskin – and by pigskin I am referring to a football, not ancient scrotal tissue.

As a woman – historically at least – you're in a bit of a pickle. Other than Julianne Moore, Brigitte Macron, and Lisa Bonet, there aren't a lot of cougar role models – I mean outside of Pornhub or that brief blip of cougarmania back in the late Aughts. I would call Ruth Gordon a cougar trailblazer, but as far as I know, Harold and Maude was fictional, and let's face it, even if you could deflower Bud Cort, that doesn't necessarily mean you should. Jason Momoa, on the other hand, well ... clearly Lisa Bonet is a witch because that dude is FOYNE. If Momoa doesn't move your needle, you're not just geriatric, you're straight up dead.

All that said, unless you're shopping pre-teens, which goes well beyond creepy into actual illegality, most guys aren't easily creeped out, so you're probably good to go. They may, however, not realize you're flirting with them. Past a certain age gap – let's go with 15 years because I truly have no earthly idea – a bat of the eyes or a coquettish toss of the hair is not necessarily going to register on the flirt meter. My bet is that for a majority of younger guys, you're going to have to spell it out plainly – ideally while looking them in the eye because making eye contact with younger men these days is kind of the holy grail, isn't it? If you can keep a young gentleman's nose out of his cell phone for more than a few minutes you are likely on your way to Boneville. At least it's good to have goals, isn't it?

I think it's safe to say that you're going to have to go through a lot of Bud Corts before you find your Jason Momoa, but he's out there – probably riding vintage Harleys and flying his freak flag with all those gray-haired geezers. My bet is that you're old enough to know that even though there are plenty of fish in the sea, you have to cast a wide net if you want to eventually catch one you want to bang. So, go forth and like Jesus, be a fisher of men. Don't worry about people thinking you're creepy. Being creepy didn't stop Ruth Gordon. It didn't stop Lisa Bonet. In the words of Seventies sage Yusuf Islam – aka Cat Stevens, "If you want to say yes, say yes, and if you want to say no, say no, 'cause there's a million ways to go, you know that there are."

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