The Austin Chronicle

Mr. Smarty Pants Knows

By Mr. Smarty Pants, June 6, 2014, Columns

According to one historian, King George V probably never told a joke, or if he did, it was probably a bad one.

In China, 520 means I love you, because the word for five sounds like I, two sounds like love, and zero sounds like you. People try to choose 520 for their cars.

Lesley Stahl of CBS's 60 Minutes recently discovered that 8-inch floppy disks are still used by the U.S. military for ICBM missile launch commands. The Air Force plans to spend $19 million on launch control center improvements in 2014 and is seeking $600 million for more upgrades next year.

Elvis Presley used Colgate toothpaste, Aqua Velva or Brut aftershave, and Hai Karate cologne. When sunning himself, he used Hawaiian Tropic. He wore Fruit of the Loom briefs. He died wearing yellow-and-black pajamas.

The rate of gun ownership in the U.S. is estimated at about 34%.

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