The Gay Place: SO MUCH BOUNCE PER OUNCE

... that we decided to EMBOLDEN all mentions of bounce in this week's listings ...

ON OUR GAYDAR

AGLCC JULY HAPPY HOUR Get high with Austin's gay chamber – high up in one of the few top-floor bars in town. Bring your cards, your swag, your swagger, and your networkiest attitude. Thu., July 19, 5:30pm. Hilton Garden Inn, 500 N. I-35, 480-8181. Free. www.aglcc.org/calendar/AGLCC-Happy-Hour-July-2012.

BEDPOST CONFESSIONS This month: Jessica Leigh Graves and her ukulele, the Professor, Sara Gray, and big-D's Roy G and the Biv, plus your mosty hostesses, Sadie Smythe, Julie Gillis, Mia Martina and Rosie Q. Thu., July 19, 8-10:15pm. ND at 501 Studios, 501 N. I-35, 485-3001. $5. www.bedpostconfessions.com.

INTO THE BLUE 2 Trippy projections, drink specials (featuring BLU) and massive EDM coronaries by DJ Bane, Astro Kid, and DJ Trey. Thu., July 19, 10pm-2am. Elysium, 705 Red River, 478-2979. Free, 21+; $5, 18-20.

RUSTY LAZER SURGERY It's a top surgery benefit for Choux, and ex-ATX-patriate BOUNCE-Jesus Rusty Lazer throws down his big NOLA nutz in solidarity. Plus raffles and tit/sans-tit "porn." Fri., July 20, 8pm-12mid. Bernadette's, 2039 Airport. $7-11 at the door. Sliding scale; no one turned away.

JORGE'S BURFDAY DISCO BOUNCE PARTY The Mouthfeelers celebrates DJ Divorcee's b-day with a night of bouncing bootayz. Special guest, NOLA BOUNCE DJ Boi Toy. Fri., July 20, 10pm-2am. Cheer Up Charlie's, 1104 E. Sixth, 431-2133. Free.

QUEER MOVIE NIGHT Ooooh, join the lovelies at this North Loop upcycle haven for a night of clammy handholding and stolen kisses, as they show The Incredibly True Adventures of Two Girls in Love and Hedwig and the Angry Inch on the big screen (or sheet, as it were). Fri., July 20, 10pm. Green House, 701 E. 53rd, 614-0140. Free. www.greenhouseaustin.com.

THE JIGGLEWATTS: TECHNICOLOR TEASE Colors stuff these wild bikinis. Careful, ladies – you'll poke an eye out with those things. Fri., July 20, 10:30pm. Beauty Ballroom, 2015 E. Riverside, 445-7499. $20, seated; $15, general. www.thejigglewattsburlesque.com.

RED HOT 2012 features Grrlz will be BoiZ, Julie Nolen & Telling Stories, the cast of Zach's Xanadu, the cast of City Theatre's Cabaret, Austin Babtist Women, Austin City Showgirls, a fashion show by Joie De Vie Salon & Spa and SHi Productions, plus special guests. B'dang! Fri., July 20, 6-10pm. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 454-8646 #104. $5 suggested donation. www.projecttransitions.org.

GREASE SING-ALONG Hopelessly devoted to helping out your neighbor struggling with HIV/AIDS? Well, get yer sweet Kenickie down to the Paramount, like greased lightning, bub. Do it for ol' Rydell and AIDS Services of Austin. Sat., July 21, 7pm. Paramount Theatre, 713 Congress, 472-5470. $45. $75 per couple. www.asaustin.org.

GIRLFRIEND PRESENTS: GIRL GANG They'll be screechin' up on two wheels (each!), so you might as well submit. Thumpz by S.I.R. and Cap'N Tits. Girl Gang rolls out right after the LezRide social bike ride, and you'll come if you know what's good for your ass – saddle sore or no. Sat., July 21, 8:30pm-2am. Cheer Up Charlie's, 1104 E. Sixth, 431-2133. Free. www.girlfriendatx.com.

BEARGASM: GYM JOX Gym bunnies and bears: Let's get jizzical! Workout gear encouraged. Sat., July 21, 9pm-2am. The Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. Free.

TRUTH OR DARE WITH NICKY DA B (Last week, we erroneously listed this at Beauty Bar; it's at the Beauty Ballroom on Riverside!) Make way for sissy BOUNCE maestro Nicky, Rusty Lazer, Orión, and Exceed. See what everyone blown away at Gay Bi Gay Gay was talking about. Sat., July 21, 9pm-12mid. Beauty Ballroom, 2015 Riverside, 391-1943. $12; $8, advance. ticketf.ly/Kea92Z, www.nickydab.com.

DEEP INSIDE: RETURN OF THE RUSH And by "Rush," they mean whooooooosh, not frat parties or tedious Canadian art rock in testicle-free registers. DJ CBass gets all up in it. Sat., July 21, 9:30pm-2am. Loft 718, 718 Congress. Free.

I'LL HAVE WHAT SHE'S HAVING: A NORA EPHRON TRIBUTE Faaaaaake orgasm contest. Why not try for a prize? Or the validation of your peers? Come celebrate the life of a dearly departed. Food, folks, and feminist fun! Sun., July 22, 6:30-8:30pm. BookWoman, 5501 N. Lamar #105-A, 472-2785. Free. www.drashpit.com.

DRAGAOKE: HOT, QUEER AMERICAN SUMMER Kings N Things whips it out on the big stage, resurrecting a fine tradition: Open Mic Drag. Spectate or spectacle-ate. It's your call, faggatron. Plus Gretchen's Disco Plague (It's Infectious!). Sun., July 22, 8pm. Beauty Ballroom, 2015 E. Riverside, 445-7499. Free. www.kingsnthings.org.

BOOZE FOR BOOBS & JOHNNYE'S EAST TEXAS SOUL FOOD OPENING East Texas soul power can heal ... well, the soul, among other things. Join Recspec and Tamale Molly-ers for this breast cancer benefit and new-trailer-joint grand opening. Baker Family, Amor Negro, and more step up to help folks dealing with the big C. Plus DJs Fine & Dandy (with Kate & Andy) – j'taime! We'll play a li'l BOUNCE to soothe ya bootysoul. Oh, and a mechanical bull. No shit. Wed., July 25, 8pm. Beauty Ballroom, 2015 Riverside, 391-1943. Donation. www.facebook.com/DJsFineDandywithKateAndy.

DEPECHE MODE TRIBUTE NIGHT Faaaaaaaaaaaggy. VJs aRGo and Shame:Les black it up. Wed., July 25, 9:30pm. Elysium, 705 Red River, 478-2979. Free.

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS NIGHT Monthly rough girl night. Free Cosmos??! And free for your man if you bring him on a leash?! These bitches are genius. This week: the Triggermen, Scorpio Rising, Hey Gurl, and DJ Sissy Ross. Last Thursdays of the month, 9pm. Frontier Bar, 2421 Webberville Rd., 243-7153. Free, 21+; $10, under 21.