This cram-packed week is kinda like Austin's mini-Pride

Texas Swingers
Texas Swingers (Photo courtesy of Texas Swing & project Transitions)

We hope you've been doing your push-ups. We'd hate to see you run out of gas for Texas Swing, Trannyshack!, Queerbomb, or anything else that's packing this week's calendar like a drag king in heat.


MEAN GIRLS MOVIE NIGHT Heathers and Plastics unite for a night of classic cattiness starting with Heathers followed by Mean Girls. Corn nuts! Thu., May 31, 6-10pm. The Q, 3408 West, 420-8557. Free.

GAYOS IN TEJAS How hard does your sissy bounce? That hard. Big Freedia and Katey Red make it go harder. Thu., May 31, doors at 8pm. Club de Ville, 900 Red River, 457-0900. $15.

THE WHOLE PACKAGE Open weekly discussion forum for gay and bisexual men, ages 18-30. Fridays, 7pm. The Q, 3408 West, 420-8557. Free.

TEXAS SWING MUSIC FESTIVAL Project Transitions transitioned its annual yee haw summer Swing into a yee haw dance music fest. This year, scoot your booty and your boots to Dale Watson, the Ghosts of Texas, Rooster Jenkins, Rough Riders, Whiskey Shivers, and a special performance by Kings N Things. Kick it all off with free dance lessons at 6:30pm by Rowdy DuFrene, cuz you'll need to bank in some workout before you sidle up to the free barbecue fixin's. Ooooo whee! Fri., June 1, 6:30pm. Ben Hur Shriners' Ballroom, 7811 Rockwood, 263-9574. $55 ($45, advance).

TRANNYSHACK! Yes, gaybies, it's the legendary West Coast party – and Heklina is bringing it, along with Lady Bear, Holy McGrail, Elijah Minnelli, Bulimianne Rhapsode, Kim Burly, Rebecca Havemeyer, Miss Rahni, Nikki Sixx Mile, April Mei Joon, Anita Whiteman, and DJ Joshua J, all together on one stage for the very first time on our third coast shores. Heeeeeey, sailor! Fri., June 1, 9:30pm. ND at 501 Studios, 501 N. I-35, 485-3001. $8.

QUEER CHEER AUSTIN POOL PARTY Ready? OK! Cheerleaders can't simply cheer their way to the bank. Somebody's gotta pay for uniforms, transport, pom-poms and those adorable little anklets. There will be free food and drink and a cool pool, fool. Sat., June 2, 1-5pm. Private residence; contact for info, message Queer Cheer Austin on Facebook.


QUEERBOMB 2012 Rally at Pine Street Station, then march (Sixth to Seventh, and back again), then party back at Pine Street. Yes, sweet luscious queerfaces, it's time for Queerbomb. QB fem/manifesto: "To honor the courageousness of the Stonewall riots, while reclaiming the radical, carnal, and transgressive spirit of our community." Rawrrr! See you on the streets. (See "Dyke in Gold Knickers," p.24.) Sat., June 2, 6pm. Pine Street Station, 1101 E. Fifth, 775-6834. Free.

QUEER NIGHT GEAR NIGHT Meet the Central Texas Boys of Leather at their table at Queerbomb. In place of their regularly scheduled Leather Social, they'll host this gear night QB afterparty. Crrrrreak! Snap! Sat., June 2, 10pm-2am. Chain Drive, 504 Willow, 480-9017.,

MAISON D'ETOILE TURNS 2 Nothin' bratty about this pack: Coco Coquette, Salon d'Etoile, and Charm School Vintage invite you to help usher in their terrific twos! Keg, cocktails, snacks, and discounts. You don't have to tell us twice. Sun., June 3, noon-6pm. Maison d'Etoile, 2109 E. Cesar Chavez, 344-9173.

SUNDAY FUNDAY A perfect post-Queerbomb cool-down with free brisket, drink specials, and the ever-lovely staff of Austin's best lez locus. Sun., June 3, 3pm. Lipstick24, 606 E. Seventh, 474-2950.

BEARADISE GARAGE Two tickets (as the song says) to one hairy heaven! DJ CBass keeps you lubed up with the Crisco disco and the bar follows suit with obscenely cheap drink specials. Sundays, 4-10pm. The Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. Free.,

SUPER SUNDAYS DIVA SHOW Join divas Kelly Kline and Jenny McCall for a night of divinity. Sundays, 10:30pm. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823. Free.

JACKPOT KARAOKE Karaoke queen Murrah Noble invites you to win big: Pick the right song and go home with the jackpot. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823. Free.

TUEZGAYZ Still the king (queen) of 'em all, y'all. Your weekend just started a li'l earlier. Tuesdays, 10pm. Barbarella, 615 Red River, 476-7766.,

To Austin, with love from Portland: Jualdo, aka Bulimianne Rhapsody, 
appears at Trannyshack!
To Austin, with love from Portland: Jualdo, aka Bulimianne Rhapsody, appears at Trannyshack!

LUSHE Cheap drinks and hot lady 'tenders by the eyeful. Not just for lushes, lady. First Tuesdays, 9pm. Rain on 4th, 217 W. Fourth, 494-1150.

JUNE SPEED NETWORKING Break it down! Cut to the chase! Like speed dating, but for connections. And nothing can get you "there" faster than a blue margarita ... just sayin'. Wed., June 6, 5:30-7:30pm. Baby Acapulco No. 3, 5610 N. I-35, 302-1366. $25; $15 chamber members.

LIZZY CAROLOKE Tippin': Not just something you do to cows. You also do it to your KJ. Wednesdays, 8pm-12mid. Bernadette's, 2039 Airport. Free.

QUEER RIDE Search Team ProHomo on Facebook for up-to-date details on meeting spots and stops of this weekly ride for Qs and supporters. BYO pals, helmets, lights, locks, IDs, and monies. Wednesdays, 7pm. Texas state Capitol, 1100 Congress, 305-8400. Free.

XIU XIU with Yamantaka//Sonic Titan and Father Murphy. Wed., June 6, 9pm. Mohawk, 912 Red River, 482-8404. $12, $10 advance.

KARAOKE WITH KRAMER Croon with the Krame, or whatever nickname you want to call him. Wednesdays, 9:30pm. The Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. Free.

NO DOVES FLY HERE Bats do. Twice a month goth with DJs Damage Done, Death Church, and Straylight. Darkness! Realness! First and third Wednesdays. Chain Drive, 504 Willow, 480-9017. Free.,


SOCIAL SCULPTURE IN THE WOODS A Busy Town art opening! More details next week, save for this shameless plug: Hot, sylvan tunes for your inner-nymph provided by DJs Fine & Dandy with Kate & Andy. Ahem. Sat., June 9, 8pm. White House Ranch, 3410 E. Pennsylvania, 845/430-2736.

TREASURE CITY DESIGN CONTEST Design it. Submit it. It might win, and you might see it on the backs of the hottest thrifters in town! All artwork needs to include the phrase: "Treasure City Thrift." See website for more details. Deadline: Sat., June 30. Treasure City Thrift, 2142 E. Seventh, 524-2820.,

AUSTIN GAY BASKETBALL LEAGUE Nothin' but net, baby! Internet, that is. The AGBL's website will keep you in the loop, or in the hoop, as it were. Whoosh! Check out the current season (season registration is now!) and info on the afterparty socials after Thursday's games. Email to register. Thursdays, 7 and 8pm games. Austin Sports Center, 425 Woodward.,

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