Gay Place: Gay as the Day Is Long

Couldn't tell you what year it was, but the memory is still imprinted on the booty. It was Austin Pride, then hosted by the Lesbian/Gay Rights Lobby of Texas (LGRL, which has since become Equality Texas), and it was held at Fiesta Gardens. Community groups and small retailers pushing rainbow everything populated booths that snaked the grounds. The event was always nice enough, but a bit of a yawn. The area selling drinks was starting to amass quite the stack of case flats – you know, those open, corrugated cardboard boxes that can hold 24 cans ... or a nice firm butt. Whose idea was it? Who knows. But a number of us grabbed a few of said flats and headed for the top of the small hill on the east side of the gardens. What happened next was sheer bliss. Sheer, silly, scrape-your-elbows-and-your-ass, hill-sliding bliss. We imagine LGRL was none too pleased with these antics, what with liability issues and all. Now, far be it for us to get on the ugly end of current fest hosts the Austin Gay and Lesbian Pride Foundation, so please don't tell them we told you about that hill.

The 2011 Austin Pride Festival and Parade dominate this week's Gay Place listings. Here's what's different from last year: It's in September (duh), it's at Fiesta Gardens, and the parade rolls in the early morning. We listed AGLPF's ticketed and free events as well as a number of non-Pride happenings around town. Congrats, AGLPF, and happy Pride, everyone.

THURSDAY

ROCKOUTLOUD! SEEKS PRIDE MARCHERS Local upcoming queer rock fest seeks marchers for this Saturday's parade. RSVP ASAP. Sat., Sept. 10, 8-11am. Town Lake Park, 920 W. Riverside, 974-6700. sylvia@rockoloud.com, www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=250490921652205.

LGBT MILITARY PRIDE SEEKS MARCHERS Grunts, soul brothers/sisters, jet jockeys, seamen/-women, dogfaces, jarheads, and vets alike are all invited to march, ten-hut! Sat., Sept. 10, 8-11am. Town Lake Park, 920 W. Riverside, 974-6700. www.facebook.com/LGBTMilitaryAustinPride2011.

AGLIFF 2011 Austin presents its annual ode to the state of modern, queer cinema – in over 100 films. Tue.-Sun., Sept. 6-11. www.agliff.org.

HRC'S EQUALITY BUS Check the website for details on stops at Whole Foods and Carver (Thursday), UT (Friday), and the Austin Pride Parade and Festival (Saturday). Fiesta Gardens, 2100 Jesse E. Segovia, 480-8318. Free. www.hrc.org/roadtoequality/texas.html.

SCHOOLS: HELPING ALL CHILDREN THRIVE The Anti-Defamation League and HRC host What Do You Know: 6-12 Year Olds Talk About Gay People. Thu., Sept. 8, 6:30-8pm. Carver Museum, 1165 Angelina, 974-4926. Free. www.hrc.org/roadtoequality/texas.html.

MULTIFAITH PRIDE SERVICE Special guest Dr. Stephen Sprinkle preaches the radical concept of radical inclusiveness. Thu., Sept. 8, 7pm. University United Methodist Church, 2409 Guadalupe, 478-9387. Free. www.austinpride.org.

VIOLET CROWN COTILLION Nancy Scott, the Rough Riders, and Fingerpistol whip it out for the Wright House Wellness Center. Thu., Sept. 8. Rusty's, 405 E. Seventh, 482-9002. www.rustysaustin.com/events.html, www.thewrighthouse.org.

MILKMILKLEMONADE is a play about an 11-year-old boy named Emory who plays with Barbies and choreographs his little heart out. Yes, dear reader, your life story, in the footlights. Thursdays-Sundays, Sept. 8-25, 8pm. The Hideout Theatre, 617 Congress, 443-3688. $15-18, online discounts available.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEDPOST CONFESSIONS! Host emcee B-Rad and guests the Queertastics and uke wondergal Jessica Leigh further titillate and lubricate. Thu., Sept. 8, 8-11pm. Spider House Ballroom, 2906 Fruth, 510/213-0517. $5. sadie@bedpostconfessions.com, www.bedpostconfessions.com.

WAAAAAAY GAY SINGALONG It will be a gay old time, and you will s(chw)ing your gay pants off. Thu., Sept. 8, 9:45pm. Alamo Drafthouse at the Ritz, 320 E. Sixth, 476-1320. $12. www.drafthouse.com/movies/sing-alongs_way_gay/austin.

ARMAGETDOWN 2 Pull down them trousers, sport. It's time for a pants-off dance-off to celebrate the relaunch of the ND. Proceeds benefit AIDS Services of Austin. Thu., Sept. 8, 10pm. ND at 501 Studios, 501 N. I-35, 485-3001. $5.

FRIDAY

TUPPERWARE FOR TREVOR For three days, raising dough is as simple as burping – Tupperware. Buy from this site to send a donation to the Trevor Project, a group providing suicide prevention services to queer teens. Sept. 9-11. 25% of all purchases go to the Trevor Project. www.lockinfreshness.com, www.thetrevorproject.org.

QUEER STATE(S) Texas artists queer (as in, the verb) gender representations in performance and visual art. We'd call that our cup of tea (or T? or E? or pee?). Opening reception, Friday, 6-9pm. Sat., Sept. 9-Sat., Nov. 5. Visual Arts Center, 23rd and Trinity, 471-1108. Free. info@utvac.org, www.utvac.org/node/537.

THE REPUBLIQ'S BIRTHDAY BASH It was 09/09/09 when Chase Martin turned on LGBT Austin's hot spot. Fri., Sept. 9, 6pm. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823. www.therepubliq.com.

COMING TOGETHER Despite record-breaking temps, hell hath frozen over and Oilcan's and Rain are collaborating on a float together. Hammer. Don't hurt 'em. Fri., Sept. 9, 5pm. The 200 block of Fourth Street.

MORE COMING TOGETHER Lone Star Bears and Heart of Texas Bears keep hell a little frosty a little longer with three prideful events: Bear Meet & Greet, Bear Party, and the Big Texas Bear Beer Bust. Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. www.lonestarbears.com, www.heartoftexasbears.org.

EMILY ERIS & SUSAN ARBUCKLE Come lounge early before you head out for your pre-Pride fandangos. Fri., Sept. 9, 7pm. Rusty's, 405 E. Seventh, 482-9002. Free. www.rustysaustin.com/events.html.

MAJESTIC PARTY: MANGUS AGLIFF and Pride collide in this merger of centerpiece film and dance party (right on the stage of the Paramount!). Fri., Sept. 9, 7:14pm. Paramount Theatre, 713 Congress, 472-5470. $15 ($10, advance; $25-1,000, VIP). www.austintheatre.org/majestic, www.agliff.org.

JIGGY CRUNK See Oaktown 357 up close and personal at this Nineties hip-hop dance party. Fri., Sept. 9, 9pm. The HighBall, 1142 S. Lamar, 383-8309. Free. www.austinpride.org.

DOGGy BOUNCE! Art show to benefit Austin Pets Alive!, as well as some proceeds from the wild night of Katey Red, DJ Alan B, and Xander Harris. Fri., Sept. 9, 9pm. Red 7, 611 E. Seventh, 476-8100. www.austinpetsalive.org, www.myspace.com/kateyred.

DRAG KINGS: THE MUSICAL 5 It's Kings N Things' annual tradition of honoring/skewering musicals. Fri.-Sat., Sep. 9-10, 9pm. Blue Theatre, 916 Springdale, 927-1118. $10.

QUEER STATE(S) AFTERPARTY WITH CHRISTEENE After contemplating the fine art at the überqueer UT art show, come meditate Christeene. Fri., Sept. 9, 10pm. Cheer Up Charlie's, 1104 E. Sixth, 471-1108. Free. www.utvac.org.

SATURDAY

PRIDE 5K RAINBOW RUN For those not inspired by the thought of an 8am jog, ponder the view from the back of the pack. Sat., Sept. 10, 8am. Starts at Riverside & South First. $40, run registration and festival entrance. www.austinpride.org.

AUSTIN PRIDE PARADE From south of the river, across the South First bridge, right on Cesar Chavez, left on Congress, left on Fourth, then back to the staging area. Then everybody disembark and head over to the fest. Sat., Sept. 10, 10:30am. www.austinpride.org.

AUSTIN PRIDE 2011 Bluebonnets with Katey Red, Kathy Valentine of the Go-Go's, Leslie & the Lys, Elephant, Cherie Lily, Yo Majesty, Oaktown's 357, Ejector, Jacinta, Lola Cola, the French Inhales, Simone Riviera, and so many more. Sat., Sept. 10. Fiesta Gardens, 2100 Jesse E. Segovia, 480-8318. $15-55. www.austinpride.org.

OUTLANDER FEST Fourteen bands performing on two stages capped off by the Dames of Deception drag show. Outlander Fest, 2-10pm; Dames of Deception, 10:30pm. Rusty's, 405 E. Seventh, 482-9002. www.rustysaustin.com/events.html.

OFFICIAL PRIDE AFTERPARTY The post-Pride afterparty kicks off with a 10-band pre-afterparty. God-Des & She and DJ LoveFreq then take it all home. Sat., Sept. 10, 4pm & 9pm. Lipstick24, 606 E. Seventh, 474-2950. www.austinpride.org.

SUNDAY

THE GREAT WIG-OFF This OctoTea 16 kickoff event features prizes for the best head of not-your-own hair. Sun., Sept. 11, 4-7pm. John Girard Salon, 800 W. Third #1308, 469-9997. Free; OctoTea $40 presale tickets available at this event. octoteadance@gmail.com, www.octopusclub.org.

PRIDE HAPPY HOUR Cherie Lily hits the 'Can. Sun., Sept. 11, 6pm. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823. Free. www.austinpride.org.

AUSTIN BABTIST WOMEN 25TH ANNIVERSARY Aww, dang, darlins, you don't look a day over 72! Sun., Sept. 11, 7-10pm. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823. www.babtistwomen.com.

AGLIFF CLOSING PARTY Wrap it up with a weiner! Um, you know, as in film: It's a wrap. Go home. End of movie. But enjoy a hot dog first. Sun., Sept. 11, 9pm. Frank, 407 Colorado, 494-6916. Free. www.agliff.org.

EJECTOR "Straight" from the Pride lineup, it's SF electrodaddies Ejector, here to fine-tune your knobs, tweak your levels, and plug you in. Sun., Sept. 11, 10pm. Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. Free; $5, ages 18-20. www.facebook.com/ejectorband.

ON OUR GAYDAR

QUEERDALINI YOGA Yup. It's Kundalini in a safe environment, for those who'd prefer to focus on chi rather than he or she. Mondays, 7-8:15pm. 1637 Barton Springs Rd. (behind Daily Juice). Donations encouraged. queerdalini@gmail.com.

A QUARTER OF A CENTURY Celebrate 25 years of one man's life with HIV, and support the appropriately named Dave Walker's AIDS Walk Austin 2011 team, Poz Men Walking! Tue., Sept. 13, 7-9:30pm. Q Austin, 3408 West Ave., 961-6714. Free (donations encouraged). davemartin1965@gmail.com, www.adventuresofdave.net/quarter-of-a-century.

HO-RIZON

GAYCL The gay alternative to benefit Equality Texas. Super yummy roster: Follow That Bird, Rickey Jean Francois, Boy Friend, Kay Leotard, Agent Ribbons, and the Great Aware. Plus! Secret surprise midnight guest (as seen on BET)! Sat., Sept. 16, 6pm. Cheer Up Charlie's, 1104 E. Sixth, 431-2133. Free.

SPEW Monthly queer/punk synapse snap featuring DJs David McN, Dave Zombi, Doug; a bitchslap booth; plus live bands Bitterhearts Society, the Smithers, We Know Where You Live, and People vs. De La Rosa happens monthly and always packs out our dear Bernie's. (See Facebook: SPEW.) Sat., Sept. 17, 6pm-1am. Bernadette's, 2039 Airport. $3.

DADT REPEAL PARTY The Austin branch of Servicemembers Legal Defense Network wants you to shout it from the mountaintop: "I'm here, I'm queer! Sir! Yes, sir!" Your service to your country is appreciated, you big, beautiful, rainbow warrior. Tue., Sept. 20, 6-9pm. Hush, 408 Congress, 299-0833. www.sldn.org.