The Austin Chronicle

Gay Place

By Kate X Messer, March 11, 2011, Columns

WELCOME TO AUSTIN! STEER HERE, QUEERS. So you just landed and are looking for a place to land, eh? Yeah, we know you're out there, desperate in the back "guest room" of some stranger's house on some floppy air bed, having scoured the "full access to kitchen" only to find half-consumed jars of peanut butter and mango salsa (yes, dear Yankeequeer, that's an option), cruising the w4w, m4m, m4t, hawk4chicken, twink4bear, butch4femme, femme4Asianfemme, etc., personals section of rags like this and online (keyword: Austin) to find some shred of human connection – your kith, your kin, your people right here in the ATX*. Why, sweet darlin', why? Why risk the petri dish of anonymous hookups in filthy back alleys when you can simply find your people right here at Austin's hotsie-totsie alternative newsweekly, in the Gay Place? Come learn about all the great LGBTQiness happening in our fair city. We'll be covering all three Conferences, on- and off-official South by Southwest propertyness this issue and next, plus in all three of the SXSW dailies. Just look for the little crown astride these here calendar listings, or check us out online. C'mon hotpants, your big gay unicorn is waiting. (* Yuh. We said it. We said, "the ATX." What of it? Not cool? You heard that real Austinites would never, ever, ever refer to their sacred patch of cosmic cowboytown as the ATX. Yeah, well, we say "Frisco," "Tha Big Dee," "Chi-Town," "Pair-EE," "LaLaLand," and we pronounce "NeeewYorKceeety" just like they do in those Pace commercials. Sue us. Though you'll never catch us saying "N'awlins." That's just sick.)

GAY ETHER Your friendly neighborhood Gay Place has our own Web page on the Chronicle website. Yes, darlin' dearies, you can access all this Gay Place goodness under one unique URL of all things gay in tha A: Under this convenient online addy shall reside the Gay Place calendar listings, the Gay Place Blog, this weekly bit of random musing, and so much more. We are proud as pregnant peacocks. Puffed up like poopy unicorns, we are. And so very chuffed that you might consider lounging with us for a bit during this big Conference. Also, our ol' pals at SXSWhomo are up and running for this year's events. Check them out on Facebook or at throughout this thing called South by Southwest. Speaking of SXSW ...

GAY MEATSPACE So, your friendly neighborhood Gay Place tour guide (me, Kate X) will be hosting this year's SXSW LGBT Interactive Meet-Up, this Saturday, March 12, 3:30-4:30pm, in the Victorian Room at the Driskill (Sixth & Brazos). And gays, I must tell you: You really, really want to see this room. It is cush red-velvet posh in its most plush whorehouse finery. And we mean that in the very best way. (Then again, we are "available" for a song, especially this time of year – and especially to dark, hard femmes whose successful startups went public this year, inspiring them to take that pile of money they are splayed naked on, relocate to Austin, and "adopt" a kept editor ... but I digress – so we are probably not the best judge as to whether or not "whorehouse" is offensive, generally speaking.) Hope to see all you flaming gay-wads out there. (See Saturday.)

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