Musings on 46 Minutes at the King of the Hill Day Barbecue
Fri., April 9, 1999
Time for some meat, thought we, so off it was to the long barbecue queue, to see the world's biggest grill (Yup. It's damn big.) and chaw on the finer parts of pig and/or cow (They were damn fine.). By the time we got to the beast itself, there was only meat and RC left. But who could ask for anything more? We took our slabs of slab and cans of the only real, true cola to the young'un to ensure that he was properly nourished for the strenuous work of drag-race spectating ahead. Known barbecue aficionados Ira Kaplan and Georgia Hubley of Yo La Tengo were in from Neeyew York Ciddy, under the cover of visiting family (yeah, right), to celebrate our mayor's wise annointing of this high holy turn of the earth as "King of the Hill Day." Once we ditched those rockers, we got on to the business of real star frottage. We did witness the races between Johnny "The Voice of Dale" Hardwick and Stephen "The Voice of Bill" Root and between Pamela "The Voice of Bobby" Segall, and Shaun "The Director" Cashman. The real Hank, Peggy, and Bobby were there in puffy outfits, and Peggy even covered her mouth in a gasp as one dragster took a tumble off the back of his mower in a too-ambitious start. "That machine done col' cocked him right on his fanny," we imagined Bill would say.
Things wound down as the meat depleted. All revelers looked fat, fed, and satisfied. We certainly were, for our 46 minutes' worth. Next year, we get there early. --Kate X Messer
