https://www.austinchronicle.com/screens/2012-11-30/a-gift-for-every-gamer/

A Gift for Every Gamer

By James Renovitch, November 30, 2012, Screens

It's like Chutes and Ladders without the chutes and where all the ladders end up at video games instead of illustrations of insufferable children. You know what, it's not like Chutes and Ladders at all.

Just Show Me All the Games | Start Over

What word best describes you?

Adult

Adult

Adult

Child

Child

Child

Young at heart

Young at heart

Young at heart

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So, adult then?

Yes

Yes

Yes

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Do you have any shame?

No

No

No

Yes

Yes

Yes

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Are You Home Alone?

Yes

Yes

Yes

No

No

No

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What is your virtual prey of choice?

People

People

People

Animals

Animals

Animals

I'd prefer not to kill

I'd prefer not to kill

I'd prefer not to kill

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Well, aren't you the humanitarian.

What do you want to hurt?

Fictional characters

Fictional characters

Fictional characters

"Real people"

"Real people"

"Real people"

No, seriously, I don't even want to hurt anything

No, seriously, I don't even want to hurt anything

No, seriously, I don't even want to hurt anything

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So, what the hell do you want?

I just want to make the world a more beautiful place

I just want to make the world a more beautiful place

I just want to make the world a more beautiful place

I guess I could damage a machine and be OK

I guess I could damage a machine and be OK

I guess I could damage a machine and be OK

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Have you been unrealistically well behaved this year?

Yes

Yes

Yes

No

No

No

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So you probably don't deserve that trip to Disneyland either?

Yes, I do

Yes, I do

Yes, I do

No

No

No

Mickey Mouse is too mainstream for me

Mickey Mouse is too mainstream for me

Mickey Mouse is too mainstream for me

I'm one of those kids who still has an imagination, and I want to use it.

I'm one of those kids who still has an imagination, and I want to use it.

I'm one of those kids who still has an imagination, and I want to use it.

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Really?

OK, No

OK, No

OK, No

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Take your pick: "extremely embarrassing" or "super-embarrassing."

Dance Central 3
Xbox
$49.99
The standard-bearer for dance games and the best reason to have a Kinect motion sensor for your Xbox.

Just Dance 4
Xbox, PS3, Wii, Wii U
$39.99
More lighthearted than Dance Central, JD4 ensures everyone is equally humiliated and therefore having a blast. The menu interface for the Kinect version of the game is a nightmare, however.

Cabela's Dangerous Hunts 2013
Xbox, PS3, Wii, Wii U
$29.99-49.99
Enjoy the great outdoors by shooting its four-legged fauna and never leaving your house.

PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale
PS3, PS Vita
$59.99
All your favorite PlayStation characters brawl to see who comes out on top. Sackboy vs. Nathan Drake? We're going with the guy made of yarn.

WWE '13
Xbox, PS3, Wii
$59.99
It's a virtual approximation of an already fake sport, but all your favorite wrestlers are there and the game has one of the best character creators in the biz.

Ugh, OK OK, we give up.

The Unfinished Swan
PS3 (download only)
$15
It's more of an interactive storybook. The paint-splattered visuals and varied (if not very challenging) puzzles make for a perfect game to play before bedtime.

Need for Speed: Most Wanted
Xbox, PS3, PS Vita, PC
$59.99
No need to shoot your way through the thin blue line when you can just outmaneuver them in your customized ride. (Reinforced chassis, anyone?)

Wii U
$300-350
Between the limited availability and the price tag, this is for someone you really love, or perhaps a kid you want to guilt into loving you more. Nintendo reinvents the controller again with a touch screen surrounded by the usual buttons and sticks. Need to free up the TV? Gameplay can conveniently be switched from the TV screen to the controller's screen. What's more, we can finally see Mario in hi-def and get a good look at that sweet 'stache.

Disney Epic Mickey 2: The Power of Two
PS3, Xbox, Wii, Wii U, Nintendo DS, PC
$49.99
Still not a trip to Disneyland, but it's a lot cheaper and there are no lines.

Adventure Time: Hey Ice King! Why'd You Steal Our Garbage?!!
Nintendo DS, Nintendo 3DS
$29.95
The cult TV show brings its signature sense of humor and style to Nintendo's handheld systems. Perfect for parents who want to laugh while looking over their kids' shoulders, longing to play, too.

Geez kid, who's flow chart is this? Nevermind, here are a few options for the creative younguns.

Scribblenauts Unlimited
Wii U, Nintendo 3DS, PC
$29.95-59.95
Stretching your imagination, typing in an idea, and watching it come to life on screen is as appealing as ever.

LittleBigPlanet Karting
PS3
$59.99
The cute and crafted characters of LBP return to throw their hats into the ring where Super Mario Kart reigns supreme.

Hotline Miami
PC
$9.99
Imagine an alternate ending to the movie Drive, where Ryan Gosling goes down the rabbit hole of slaughtering his enemies while slowly losing his mind. Pixilate the blood spatter, and you have this surreal trip into 80s ultra-violence.

Call of Duty: Black Ops II
Xbox, PS3, Wii U, PC
$59.99
War is hell, especially when there are zombies in the battle.

Halo 4
Xbox
$59.99
New developer, but the latest Halo still executes flawlessly.

Assassin's Creed III
Xbox, PS3, Wii U, PC
$59.99
If your killing sprees only feel valid if they have the OK of America's founding fathers, this one's for you. Only you can help make those Redcoats a little redder. With blood. Get it?

Hitman Absolution
Xbox, PS3, PC
$59.99
How deep you can make the pools of blood matters less in this long-awaited sequel than going undetected. When a game starring a hitman ends up on the nonviolent end of the spectrum, you know the continuum is screwy.
Start Over