The Austin Chronicle

https://www.austinchronicle.com/screens/2006-02-17/339298/

In Print

By Kate X Messer, February 17, 2006, Screens

The Big Book of Porn: A Penetrating Look at the World of Dirty Movies

by Seth Grahame-Smith

Quirk Books, 208 pp., $19.95

Is it a testament to the genre that more people recognize The Devil in Miss Jones than the screwball classic, The Devil & Miss Jones, for which it was named? Is it telling that Googling the word "porn" yields more hits than "money," "love," or "god"? Porn has us by the 'nads.

Shoveling one-liners like a naughty uncle ("German porn has more poop flying around than the primate house at the Berlin Zoo"; "Ever wonder what Of Mice and Men would have been like with penetration and a happier ending?"), author Seth Grahame-Smith makes that case in this jolly – almost tasteful – ode to distaste.

Porn begins with a cool time line tracing roots back to the earliest flickers of racy shorts like Edison's "Aunt Sallie's Wonderful Bustle," while other chapters tackle tough topics like: 20 Sacred Porn Movie Rules (eg, "Always ejaculate in plain sight"); the Porn Glossary ("Blind Man," "Crewkake," and "Filling the Pool"); and a list of 300 Real Porn Titles, including Operation Just Cooze, Remember the Tight 'Uns, Diddle Her on the Roof, and Oh Brother, Who Fuck Thou?

Mr. Grahame-Smith's qualifications are a mystery ... but it's porn, for fucksakes. And like the titillating genre, the book is loaded with enticing eye candy and a fun, flirtatious layout – imagine Skinemax doing a VH1 special: Behind the Porn, in book form. Perhaps this disco sensibility hints at Grahame-Smith's greater design: to celebrate porn's "Golden Decade" (the Seventies).

In fact, a better name might be The Golden Age of Porn. Taken as a comprehensive guide, The Big Book falls short, barely acknowledging the almost egalitarian approach of contemporary DIY Internet nasties and utterly snubbing queer and alternative porn. Sure, obscure genres are given their list, but ignoring the Rockland Bros. or the one-man industry that is Jeff Stryker is simply irresponsible.

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