Rethinking 'Monkey Movie'

When you say "monkey movie," you might as well say "movie." From a strictly Darwinistic point of view, any movie is a monkey movie. But for the sake of academics and ashtray journalism, we'll put zoology and evolution aside for the moment and focus solely on films which feature what are generally considered primates or simulations thereof.

In researching titles featuring monkeys, chimps, apes, gorillas, men in monkey suits, monkeys in man suits, animations, and animatronics, a remarkable number of film titles emerge. If three film lovers sit in a room for two hours, they can conjure more than a hundred. Thought about John Cusack's first film, Class, lately? He wears a monkey suit in it. Even the brand-new Charlie and the Chocolate Factory has a scene where Willy teleports a Wonka bar into the opening segment of 2001: A Space Odyssey, keenly replacing Kubrick's monolith with chocolate. So, is C&TCF a monkey movie?

Certainly an intriguing debate, but the bottom line has to be the unacceptability of Bedtime for Bonzo and Delicatessen ever being spoken of in the same breath.

As such, I propose the following subcategories of "monkey movie" to better understand not only these films, but where we come from:

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CHIMP

These are monkey movies featuring actual, subhumanoid primates. Rights groups will hate you for watching these because they are cruel to animals. (see "A Better Place," p.26). I will hate you for making me watch them because they are not the least bit funny.

Examples: Every Which Way but Loose, Any Which Way You Can, Bedtime for Bonzo, The Barefoot Executive

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CHUMP

This is what I'm talking about. This category is defined by the man in the monkey suit. King Kong in terms of hilarity.

Examples: Born to Be Wild; Ed; Mom, Can I Keep Her?; Buddy; Schlock; Congo; Gorillas in the Mist; Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla; A Gorilla Meets Two Brooklyn Idiots; Africa Screams; Robot Monster (see p.58)

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CHIMP CHAMPION

Features primates, monkey suits, or both, but carries the caveat of being a verifiable classic of cinema, and thereby gains exemption from Chimp or Chump. A Hall of Fame, really.

Examples: King Kong (1933), The Wizard of Oz, 2001: A Space Odyssey

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CHIM CHIM

Animated

Examples: Jungle Book, Sinbad

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MONKEY'S UNCLE

These films have "monkey" in the title, but seemingly have nothing whatsoever to do with them.

Examples: Monkey Business, Drunken Monkey, Spanking the Monkey

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MONKEE

The Monkees' psychedelic homage features cameos by Frank Zappa, Dennis Hopper, Jack Nicholson, and Bela Lugosi.

One (and thankfully only) example: Head