| Sure, here at the Chronicle -- where 60 of us are crammed into a bunker-chic brick hovel not big enough for Adolf, Eva, and their doomed pet schnauzers -- we understand why your lifestyle demands 3,500 square feet to keep clean, fill with stuff, and dust semi-regularly. We know that scraggly-haired hippie next door is festering in some stale boho-topia when people survived without built-in wine racks, 12-foot ceilings, and proper closets. Prove him wrong. With the Bloat-o-Meter, the people will judge: is your house pleasantly plump or garishly outsized? And if you're that hippie next door, vindicate your outrage: submit the neighborhood eyesore to the People's Court of Austin-Weird Taste. The person who submits the photo of the ugliest McMansion -- as judged by the highest readers' score on the Bloat-o-Meter -- will receive a good-sized live oak (donated by TreeFolks, Inc., the non-profit that makes growing the urban forest of Central Texas its business), so that in 70 years you'll no longer have to see Chateau du Screw You. On the other hand, if your private Versailles is chosen the McMansionest McMansion of all, let us know. Upon providing proof of ownership, you, too, will receive a native Texas tree, ideally with shallow roots. But for now, the only thing planted is your tuckus in front of this terminal -- so rate that specimen of Contemporary Austin Architecture to your right to get started, and send us your plus-sized pics via the upload link at the top. - The Chronicle News Staff | |
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