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The Luv Doc

Not Getting Used

Not Getting Used
Dear Luv Doc,
Whenever my ex was not in jail, hospital or rehab, she lived with me the past two years. Our last three months of cohabitation came with my insistence that she contribute to the household financially and with housework. I had never insisted on this before as strongly as I did this time. She’d always been helpful in the past but this time, the final three months were different. She promised each month to come through in some way but failed each month to even make an effort to fulfill my request. It seems as though she really thought having sex with me was sufficient. Could a woman seriously believe that? I finally told her she’d have to move out, and after two weeks she did. She directly moved in with another man and that ended our relationship without any discussion. She left clothing here at my place and continues to delay picking it up week after week. 1) How long should I wait before tossing her clothes to the trash? 2) How can I prevent this in the future? 3) What psychological or behavioral characteristics should I look for in a woman before she moves in? I don’t want this experience again.
Naively yours, Tony
PS: I would love to see this printed in the Chronicle because your answers will help a lot of other men not get used.

Dude. Seriously. Dude. Jail? Hospital? Rehab? Really the only thing missing here is weeping meth scabs and a persistently itchy crotch. Did her head occasionally spin around 360 degrees and spew green vomit? Did it feel like you answered your own questions when you put this in writing? OK, enough with the incredulity. I’ll roll up my sleeves and get to the task at hand. Question one: Call her and tell her to pick up her clothes by a specific date and time or you will take them to Goodwill where she can purchase them back at a slight markup. Question two: Fucking somebody isn’t a good reason to have them move in with you. Do the math. Sex lasts maybe 15 minutes, but crazy lasts all fucking day … and night. You shouldn’t let somebody move in with you until they have proven they have skills off the mattress … or table … or chair … or bearskin rug … or Vietnamese spin fuck harness. You get my meaning? Question three: Refer to answer two. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that jail, hospital, and rehab are red flags. The same could be said for meth scabs and crotch scratching. Really, I could spend a few thousand words on this question alone, but you might have your own list that doesn’t include dirty fingernails, rotten teeth, and eyes that never blink. Point is, sex or no sex, you should expect/demand any potential cohabitant to behave like a respectful, responsible human being. If you don’t know what that is, I can’t help you.

Need some advice from the Luv Doc? Send your questions to luvdoc@austinchronicle.com, or check out the Luv Doc Archive.

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