The Austin Aztex have announced a strategic alliance with Club de Futbol Monterrey – also known as Rayados (the striped ones) – of the Mexican first division. Among other things, Aztex players get a great shot to move up to top-division football, the team gets a chance to pick up top-level players on loan, and fans get to see Rayados and perhaps other top Mexican teams in exhibitions at the Aztex home field. Speaking of which, sorry I can't tell you where that home field's going to be, but by the time you read this, that agreement should be finalized, and it's good news; see this space for details as soon as they're released.
The Aztex' primary affiliate, England's Stoke City, crashed out of the Carling Cup quarterfinals Tuesday, losing at home to second-division Derby, 1-0, on a last-second penalty. Elsewhere, Burnley upset Arsenal, but Spurs and Manchester United make it two Premier League teams in the final four.
Dec. 15 is the early registration deadline for the Aztex' first-ever youth soccer camps, to be held Dec. 22-24 and Dec. 29-31. English soccer great and Aztex USL-1 Head Coach Adrian Heath will oversee the camps, designed for kids ages 5-14. Cost is $120; register at www.austinaztex.com.
Below: Women's College Cup live on ESPN; U-20 World Cup news, and more.
"Texas Stadium!" said Some Guy, executing a deep and audible stage-inhale to underscore the point. "You can just smell ('smay-ulll') the history!" (or something like that). It was the last Thanksgiving game to be played in the Seventies-era monument to ego and championships; featured were the skin-of-their-teeth Dallas Cowboys (of course) vs. the going-nowhere Seattle Seahawks. (The same guy, or someone in his general vicinity, would in the fourth quarter narrowly escape a beat-down instigated by his Springer-ready girlfriend's spewing of a racist epithet.)
Dude paid his money and has a right to his opinion, I suppose, but really the "history" (also known as "age") of Texas Stadium can be seen more than smelled (perhaps God's glory hole makes for superior air circulation). It's in the ever-grimier concrete columns and faded sidelines, the seats with missing numbers, the dangling-by-a-screw paper-towel holders in the ladies' rooms, the eternal white stripe that is the cheerleaders' shorts, the pollution-besmirched stars ringing the exterior; it's in the scale of things.
As Oklahoma, a loser to the Texas Longhorns, prepares to play Missouri, a loser to the Texas Longhorns, in the Big 12 title game on Saturday, there is only one appropriate gift for OU Coach Bob Stoops. To memorialize his name with a new word in the dictionary. My choice is the verb Stoop: to be beaten by a lesser opponent due to a bureaucratic decision.
Stoops' Sunday press conference about the decision based on Bowl Championship Series standings to break a three-way tie between UT, OU and Texas Tech, each one-loss teams, is enough to merit putting Stoops right up there with Rick Santorum, but in a much more family-friendly way, as a name for the dictionary. Talking to reporters, Stoops went so far as to tout his team's victory over yesterday's champs at Nebraska as a shining example of Sooner prowess. He was also quick to talk up the 20-point 61-41 win Saturday over Oklahoma State, failing to mention that the margin was aided by a very late, score-padding touchdown which was welcomed greedily by a grinning Stoops on the sidelines. Had he told his QB not to pass the ball, but do everything possible to get that ball in the end zone? I wish someone had the guts to ask him. Either way, the game was a lot closer than Stoops would have us believe.
He also gave the Longhorns grief for the effort to repeatedly remind the nation of Texas' 45-35 win over the Sooners, joking that OU officials had considered flying a plane over Texas' Turkey Day stomping of Texas A&M. The problem is Longhorn officials weren't behind the effort; it was a UT student using the power of Facebook. When I joined the Facebook group in question last week, it had 3,000 member; within a few hours it had climbed to 11,000 and shot upward to the heavens. The message spread like crazy through the Longhorn fan base. UT Coach Mack Brown didn't start politicking until after a certain Coach Stoops got the ball rolling earlier in the week.
Reveille dangles limply from a string attached to a long stick as a Longhorn fan tries repeatedly to ignite the sad dog. Finally the spark takes, and the Texas A&M mascot turns into pure flame lifted aloft as an offering to the gods of football.
This is tailgating taken to the monied extremes. Like fajitas once were the meat that only poor people ate (and fajitas were never chicken), like punk rock was once rebellious, the University of Texas tailgate — some outdoor grilling you did to while the time with family and friends after assuring yourself of an early and reliable parking spot—has gone corporate. State employee lots that once were seen as prime game-day parking are now Austin’s Disneyland complete with corporate sponsors. It works like this: put up the banner of Bland Light and get 25 cases of tasteless corporate beer to hand out to your friends and coworkers. Entire areas are roped off for a jumbo party that spills, beer can in hand, to near the refurbished, expanded, corporate-box-added stadium where Sports Illustrated has its tent offering free copies of the latest special issue.
Power, fun, safety, and belonging. Those are the four basic human emotional needs, and all are for sale here today, Longhorn Inc. says. Wear our team colors, drink some more Boring Light. Come to the stadium food court (now open during the school week!) for a $6.50 chopped barbecue sandwich or two chicken tenders for $10. Yell from your seats at the idiots from College Station. Revel in how much better your team is. They are fools and losers. Today is Thanksgiving. We give thanks that we are not you.
It may feel like the Lonestar Rollergirls 2008 season has just finished (read what Honey Homicide had to say about that here), but the preparations for 2009 have begun.
There's two big announcements that have already been made. The full schedule has been released (see below the fold for all 14 events), but to start the season the traditional way, the all-star 2009 All Scar Army lineup has been announced. Drawn from the regular teams, it's this one-off roster that'll be facing off against 2008 champions the Holy Rollers on Sunday, Jan. 4. The players to make the cut are:
Polly Urethane (Cherrybombs)
Rocky Casbah (Cherrybombs)
Daisy Mae Damage (Cherrybombs)
Kate or Dye (Cherrybombs)
Curly Suicide (Hellcats)
Dirty Blonde (Hellcats)
Dixie Sanchez (Hellcats)
Purr Anna (Hellcats)
Holly Peno (Putas del Fuego)
Evil Stellator (Putas del Fuego)
Maya Mayhem (Putas del Fuego)
Kategory 5 (Rhinestone Cowgirls)
Rollergazm (Rhinestone Cowgirls)
Chronicle photographer Sandy Carson was there to document the excitement of UT's 3-1 victory over Nebraska in Gregory Gymnasium on Wed., Nov. 19. Destinee Hooker led UT to victory on this evening and hopes to do the same when the NCAA Division I tourney begins Thursday, Dec. 4.
For more on UT volleyball, please see Thomas Hackett's Nov. 28 column "Playing Through." And don't forget to check out Carson's awesome shots in the photo gallery at right.
The Potters defeated West Bromwich Albion 1-0 last weekend in EPL play
The Texas A&M women advanced to the NCAA Elite Eight, coming from behind with two goals 46 seconds apart to win 2-1 at Florida. They're the last Texas college team left alive, because the top-ranked Trinity men were upset by Amherst, 1-0, in the Division III quarterfinals. Also out in the quarterfinals: the Midwestern State men and Texas A&M-Commerce women. Portland, who ended UT's season last week, also advanced to the quarterfinals, while setting a new season attendance record for women's soccer. The Aggies, with the nation's second-highest season attendance, also beat the old record.
The Columbus Crew won the MLS Cup Sunday, beating New York 3-1, with all three goals coming on assists from MLS Player of the Year Guillermo Barros Schelotto. The Crew become the first team in six years to have the best regular season record and the Championship in the same year.
It's pretty much all smiles at Austin Aztex HQ these days, with plans for next season coming along, sister squad Stoke City notching another win in the English Premier League, and the Aztex being named the top PDL expansion franchise of the year. Look for a long-awaited major announcement from the club (nudge nudge, wink wink) in the next week.
Austin's participants in the newly formed Southern Indoor Football League announced today their moniker, Austin Turfcats, and their new logo (see right). The Turfcats home opener will be held in April at the Travis County Expo Center. Ronald Oswalt was named the team's vice-president and general manager and had the following to say, “We are excited to share the good news of our team and our commitment to this community."
The Turfcats will be keeping things green, literally, by having chosen Armadillo Gold, Recycling Green, and Natural White as their official team colors.
The SIFL will also field teams from Houma, La.; Houston; Lafayette, La.; Lake Charles, La.; and Pasadena, Texas. For info on tickets call 832/754-7666 or e-mail turfcats@gmail.com.
Computer know all. Computer good. Computer see far into BCS future and deep into your soul. It see Texas Longhorns good. Longhorns No. 2. They beat Oklahoma 45-35 and Bob Stoops not smile enough. OU now No. 3. OU beat Texas Tech to pulp 65-21 because Red Raider soul not pure. Texas Tech get cocky. OU have running game and defense. Tech have coach who look like country singer. Country singers lose to no smile. Texas better than Oklahoma by .0084. Oklahoma have no coastline.
Computer say Mack Brown nice man. Computer say style points better for no smile Stoops. Computer say Longhorns meet Aggies at home to end season. Aggies bad. Lose to bad Baylor. Tech lose to bad Baylor this weekend? OU lose to Oklahoma State where coach smile even less and yell at people? Computer confused. Texas beat Aggies 94-3 and Texas better. Oklahoma beat angry man 187-24 and OU better. Texas Tech beat Baylor 11,749 to 243 and fly to moon.
Computer not know Missouri. Computer say Missouri not matter. Computer say Aggies are joke. Computer say Texas score many points. Computer say ask me more next week. Insert 50 cents for next three minutes. Computer not sure about tomorrow. Computer know all.
The Big 12 South is currently the toughest conference in college football, boasting three teams ranked in the Top 5 – Texas Tech, Texas, and Oklahoma – all having a shot at winning the National Championship. The question is: Which of these teams will survive their tenacious conference schedule and come out on top? Oklahoma was upset by Texas in the Cotton Bowl, Texas was upset by Texas Tech in Lubbock, and now Tech has to travel to Oklahoma on Saturday to face a red-hot Sooners team that many are predicting to win, even though Tech is ranked higher. It is a vicious cycle, but I think it is safe to say that whoever wins the Big 12 South will be the odds-on favorite to run the table and take home the National Championship. With that said, all that’s left now is to figure out which team will be the last one standing.
Texas started all this trouble when they decided that rebuilding years were for losers like the University of Michigan and opened up the season by destroying anyone unlucky enough to be in their path. It took a while for the UT alumni to believe that the Horns were legit, but everything changed when Texas beat No. 1 ranked Oklahoma in the Cotton Bowl. The Sooners had the Horns down by 10 points twice in the first half alone, but like a pimple on picture day, the Horns just refused to go away. In what was probably one of the gutsiest performances in Texas’ season, the Horns prevailed 45-35, and took over the No. 1 ranking in the country. The victory was the first of what would be four games against ranked opponents that included Missouri, Oklahoma State, and Texas Tech, and had it not been for a last-second Texas Tech touchdown by Michael Crabtree, the Longhorns would be cruising to another Big 12 Championship game. With one loss on their record, Texas is still a threat and need only for Oklahoma to beat Texas Tech this Saturday to put them right back in the race for the National Championship.
