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Thursday, March 18
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THE GAY PLACE   
 
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ARE YOU WORTH A MILLION IN PRIZES? How about $300? Well, come on down and take it all off, Bruce, we'll be the judge of that. All-male and amateur, just like you like it. Thursdays, 9pm. Rain on 4th, 217 W. Fourth, 494-1150.
BACK TO CLASS WITH (CL)ASS Talk about your student bodies. Win, win, win in OCH's Student Body Strip Off doing what you do in the locker room every day. DJ's Bryan Konrad and Filthy Rich spin it to win it. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823.
BEAR NATION If a bear poops in the woods, is the pope Catholic? Find out at this faboo doc of all things fierce, follicled, and fat (or, ahem, hefffffty). Brought to you by the director of Small Town Gay Bar, Malcolm Ingram. 12:30pm. G-Tech, 501 E. Fourth. $10 day of film, or admission with SXSW Film badge. www.sxsw.com, www.bearnationmovie.com
BENT COMPASS PARTY Come support queers of the local (and some not so local) bent. Avi Wisnia, Tribella, Benko, Julie Nolan & Telling Stories, and Alli Reece play their guts out for you. 8pm. Rain on 4th, 217 W. Fourth, 494-1150.
BLOGGITY BLOG BLOG BLOG Why wait 'til Thursday? Come visit us online at the Gay Place Blog and on our design blog, Chronique. Join the fun; leave a comment. Maybe win yourself a nice unicorn or T-shirt or something. Or go naked for all we care. (You can do that while you read a blog.) 454-5766. gayplace@austinchronicle.com austinchronicle.com
FREE MUSIC AT THE SAN JOSE The majestic pearl on Congress shares her glow. (Relax, Liz, we mean the hotel!) Alejandro Escovedo, Amy Cook & Tosca Strings, David Garza, the SIMS benefit, and so much more. Wed.-Sat., Mar. 17-20, 8pm. Hotel San José, 1316 S. Congress, 444-7322. Free. www.sanjosehotel.com
MUNDI/BUST FEST WITH SANDRA BERNHARD Those lips! That laugh! You had us at "Madonna." Also featuring White Widow, Kiss Kiss, Outernational, and more. noon. Cafe Mundi, 1704 E. Fifth, 236-8634. Free. www.sandrabernhard.com
NAKIA'S OFFICIAL SHOWCASE Some bears sound too big. Some, too little. This bear sounds juusssst right! 8pm. Bethell Hall, St. David's, 301 E. Eighth. www.nakia.net
SCORE! Your roommate may think you wildly optimistic when you shout, "I'm going to score at Oilcan Harry's!" But that's just because he doesn't know about OCH's new sports bar, featuring six honkin' LED flat screens with sports packages. Yes, we said "packages." From DirecTV, silly. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823.
SOUL SISTERS ON WEBBERVILLE ROAD Hey Austin, meet Lisa Marshall. Her voice will implode your pacemaker. Hey Austin, meet TC's hostess Baby Girl. Her hospitality will take care of the rest of what's left of your heart. 9pm. T.C.'s Lounge, 1413 Webberville Rd, 926-2200. www.lisamarshallmusic.com
THE KELLY KLINE SHOW Each week, special guests. Every week, the Manwatch Dancers. 6-9pm & 10:30pm until close. Charlie's Austin, 1301 Lavaca, 474-6481.
THE SHONDES Some nice kids your bubbie would love. Part of the A Band and a Blog 2 day party. 11am. Club Primo's, 1700 E. Sixth, 801-3892. www.shondes.com
ZACH MUSIC FEST Intimate, great sound, and in a frickin' musical theatre, no less. Fourteen bands, three nights, featuring Guy Forsyth, Wendy Colonna, Seahorse, Ginger Leigh, and more. Zach Theatre, 1421 W. Riverside, 476-0594; 1510 Toomey; 1510 Toomey, 476-0541. $20, one-day ticket; $50, three days.

ONGOING THE GAY PLACE
 
'AUSTIN CHRONICLE' GAY URLS! You can directly access the Chronicle's gay listings online without clicking until your fingers turn blue. Plus the URLs are super easy to remember. The Austin Chronicle gAyTX Fun Guide is our regularly updated list of fine local queer establishments and concerns. And Gay Place is, of course, what you are reading here, our weekly best of the best of queer Austin. 454-5766. gayplace@austinchronicle.com austinchronicle.com, austinchronicle.com (Announcements)
ACTOM Because men are like coffee; the best ones are rich, hot, and can keep you up all night. Join Austin Coffee, Tea, or Me? - an online group to help you find Mr. Right ... or at least Mr. Right There, oh yes, right there. groups.yahoo.com (Meetings & Instructions)
ADVENTURING OUTDOORS Austin's gay and lesbian group for making the nature scene. Minimal dues, maximum fun! 236-7176. www.main.org (Recreation & Fitness)
ARE YOU A PROUD TEXAN? Do you care what happened in this Lege session? About fights for equality and equal protection under the law? Get on Equality Texas' list. This week they seek eager volunteer types to assist in Pride preparation. They have daytime, afterwork, and club-hopping opportunities. Call Bren for further info. Equality Texas, PO Box 2340, Austin, 78768-2340, 474-5475. info@equalitytexas.org www.equalitytexas.org (Civic Interest)
ATTICUS CIRCLE Come join the grassroots gay-straight alliance that stands up for dignity, justice, and the (true) American way! Huzzah! 450-5188. info@atticuscircle.org www.atticuscircle.org, www.myspace.com (Civic Interest)
CAPITAL CITY FRONT RUNNERS Gay runners meet Tuesday and Thursday (6pm) and Saturday (10am). Oooh, girl, when they told you you were "fast" at the club, they had no idea! And such stamina! Meet at North Shore of Lady Bird Lake under the MoPac bridge, 453-8878. www.capitalcityfrontrunners.com (Recreation & Fitness)
CHARLIE'S GRILL Austin's gay club right next to the Capitol dome is open for lunch and dinner every Monday through Friday (see new, extended hours). On Tuesdays, the hours extend even further (until 8:30pm) for one of the best steak nights around. Come have dinner with family! Mon.-Fri., noon-7pm. Charlie's Austin, 1301 Lavaca, 474-6481. (Announcements)
CRUISE WITH MCC Metropolitan Community Church takes to the high seas with this fun-in-the-autumn-sun fundraiser. Plan now for a seven-night Caribbean Cruise launching next year. Departs from Galveston Sun., Nov. 7, 2010. 888/798-6226. www.mccaustin.com, www.rauschgrouptravel.com
FAUSTO FERNÓS IS COMING If you were suckling a pacifier in the mid-Nineties and consider yourself a student of the absurd, then edjumakate yourself: One of our mos faboo perf art dandinas is coming home for South by Southwest. SXSW, all over the place. Austin Convention Center, 500 E. Cesar Chavez, 404-4000. www.youtube.com, www.feastoffun.com
FEMINISTO! Soul poetry, soul music, and soul food, coming to a soul kitchen near you. Save this date. Really. Thu., Apr. 1, 8pm. T.C.'s Lounge, 1413 Webberville Rd, 926-2200. www.abelouiseyoung.com
FOODIES Yup. Women Who Love Women Who Love Food. In lieu of Austin's having an actual lesbian gathering space, this e-mail-based social network holds weekly meet-ups, private house parties, and special events for the lay-deez. Women of all stripes are welcome and encouraged to attend. E-mail Kitty to get on the list. beatsagogo@aol.com (Civic Interest)
FOODIES' SASSY NEW WEBSITE Yup. Women Who Love Women Who Love Food. In lieu of Austin's having an actual lesbian gathering space, this e-mail-based social network holds weekly meet-ups, private house parties, and special events for the lay-deez. Women of all stripes are welcome and encouraged to attend. E-mail Kitty to get on the list. beatsagogo@aol.com www.foodiesaustin.com (Civic Interest)
HILL COUNTRY RIDE, YO Now's the time to get your pedal-pushin' posse, papi, to raise dough for services for those affected by HIV/AIDS through our beloved Interfaith Care Alliance. Do it. Then you can watch your team's name on the big board as that dollar figure soars! Sat., Apr. 24. 371-RIDE. www.hillcountryride.org, www.interfaithcarealliance.org
HIV RESOURCE GUIDE is a great resource for folks in need of services as well as those who just want to volunteer or help. Austin Area HIV Planning Council, 505 Barton Springs Rd., Fifth Floor, 974-2615. Free. (Announcements)
HIV+ COUNSELING HIV-positive? This group explores issues from recent diagnosis to life with HIV. Free to individuals who qualify; sliding scale for everyone else. Waterloo Counseling Center, 314 E. Highland Mall Blvd. #301, 444-9922 x100. www.waterloocounseling.org (Meetings & Instructions)
HOMOS READ POMO Do you read? Eat? Drink? Like the ladies? Do democratically chosen books such as Orlando: A Biography by Virginia Wolfe turn you on? They do pomo; they don't even read pomo. pseudopants@gmail.com
HOT BEARS SAY RRRRROOOOW! The cuddliest, hairiest, most barrel-chested bigboys of the Heart of Texas Bears are a social service group dedicated to all things "grrrrr." Get on their list for info about monthly coffees, movie nights, beer busts, etc. info@heartoftexasbears.org www.heartoftexasbears.org (Civic Interest)
INSIDE BOOKS NEEDS GLBT BOOKS Studies show that education reduces recidivism! Send your tax-deductible books and donations now. All topics in the GLBT spectrum needed (especially trans topics). www.insidebooksproject.org (Volunteers)
INVITE TO A WILDE PARTY For those who are wild about the theatre, Zach brings you the Wilde Party offered at each main-stage show. Food, drinks, and a fabulous show especially for the family and those that love us. Preshow mixer, 6:45pm; show at 8pm. Zach Theatre, 1421 W. Riverside, 476-0541; 1510 Toomey, 476-0541. www.zachtheatre.org (Announcements)
JUST VISITING? WHERE THE QUEERS AT? Welcome to Austin! Don't know where to go, you big beautiful queer? Let our Austin Chronicle gAyTX Fun Guide assist you. gayplace@austinchronicle.com www.austinchronicle.com (Announcements)
LAMBDA OF TEXAS STATE Get back to class with class, and hang out with fellow LGBT Bobcats and allies. Check the website for weekly meetings and the awesome, twice-a-year Bobcat Ball. Texas State University campus, San Marcos. www.studentorgs.txstate.edu (Civic Interest)
MIDTOWNE SPA FREE PASS Yo, Hunky Brewster: Get on the Midtowne site, and click on the Free Pass link to get free admission to some steamy relief. 18 and up, no alcohol. Midtowne Spa, 5815 Airport, 302-9696. www.midtowne.com (Announcements)
MYSPACE IS FOR QUEERS Yuh-huh. We up and did it. All 2006-ish, we finally got caught up to 2004 and leapt into the Rupert Murdoch-void balls-out, baby. (Cough.) Uh, yeah. So, send us your info the ol'-fashioned way at our regular, dependable Chronicle e-mail addy, or come be our friend online and send us stuff there! Humor us with an add, at the very least? Like a perky poodle on the leg of luv, we're notorious collectors … shameless. Queers named "Gay Place" who refuse to Facebook. Yup. We are unabashed in our quest to crack 2,999. (Who said "ho"?) We'd be proud to have you as our friend. Check our occasional specially themed top friends, and see if you make the cut. gayplace@austinchronicle.com www.myspace.com (Announcements)
OUT YOUTH DROP IN High school can be hell, especially for the li'l tyke dykes and fag-o-tots. Our local nonprofit support/drop-in center for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and questioning peeps, ages 12-19, is open to youth three days a week. A place where they can be. Just ... be. Sun. & Wed.-Thu., 4:30-8:30pm. Out Youth House, 909 E. 49th, 419-1233. (Civic Interest)
POSITIVE INFLUENCE Therapy/support group for HIV-positive gay men. Eight-week sessions. Call for schedule. Wednesdays, 6-7:30pm. 784-8220. (Meetings & Instructions)
PREORDER AMMONITE Support local poetry and order Abe Louise Young's upcoming chapbook now. E-mail for ordering info. $14 for one, $25 for two, $33 for three, etc. abelouiseyoung@gmail.com www.abelouiseyoung.com
PROJECT 1138 WEBSITE How many benefits are you (or your friends) denied as a member of a same-sex couple? Here's a nice online way to tally our second-class citizenship in one fell swoop. chip@equalityforum.com www.project1138.com, www.equalityforum.com
SAPPHFIRE Do you prefer game nights, movie nights, lazy Sunday brunches, and Sapphic book clubs to all-night stomps through the Warehouse District? Well, meet your peeps. Check the Web site for the where and when. 833-5040. info@sapphfire.org www.sapphfire.org (Announcements)
SOUTH BY SO GAY Who luvs ya, baby? A big queer named Gay Place, that's who. Make sense of all the gayest on- (Bounce showcase! Magnetic Fields film! Bears!) and off-SXSW property (Bent Compass! GaybiGayGay! Hot local queers!) madness that happens mid-March through our decidedly pink and purple lense. With unicorns. We'll have it all laid out for you like a twink on satin on our new Austin Chronicle all-gay, all-day Web page. p.s. Bands, bookers, gay bars, yo mama: E-mail your info to us now. March 12-21. 454-5766. Free. gayplace@austinchronicle.com austinchronicle.com
ST. EDWARD'S GAY/STRAIGHT ALLIANCE Austin's own St. Ed's has its own GLBT/straight alliance. That's one big rainbow up on that hill. St. Edward's University campus, 416-5876. kathyb@stedwards.edu www.stedwards.edu (Civic Interest)
SUPER BUFFET/MANWATCH DANCERS Watch the Men of Manwatch wiggle as you scarf down that free buffet, 6-9pm. DJ Bryan Konrad spins, 9pm-close. Wipe your chin, skippy. Fridays. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth, 320-8823.
TEXAS HILL COUNTRY FAERIES, ELVES, & SATYRS That's THCFES to you, delicate nymph of the forest glen. (All's we wanna know is: Where are the fekkin' unicorns?!) THCFES is a group for alternative/progressive gay men who understand the goodness of all things fae. Yae! www.groups.yahoo.com, tribes.tribe.net (Civic Interest)
TGT It's time for school, and UT's Transgender Texas is fabulous and here to stay. So if you are a trans-identified Longhorn, get in touch. jesse.free@riseup.net (Civic Interest)
THE LESBIAN COFFEE HOUSE No bar, no coffeehouse, so where are lesbians supposed to meet chicks? Austin Lesbian Coffee House is a group of LBTs that meet monthly to mix and mingle. Sign up to get the secret deets. www.meetup.com
TOUCH DANCE/PARTNER DANCE GROUP Do you lead or do you follow, darlin'? This group of gay-friendly women loves to dance and has formed this social group to which all gay-friendly women, 21 and older, are invited. Sometimes, they will meet at dance events; sometimes, they will hit the floor at a local club to practice. What better way to improve (or acquire) those skills? And those skills. Free. austin_dancers@gmail.com (Meetings & Instructions)
TRANSFORMATIONS PSYCHOTHERAPY SERVICES Katy Koonce, LCSW, offers transsexual support groups with a holistic approach. 329-6699. Donations accepted. katykoonce.com (Meetings & Instructions)
TWO SLEEPING BAGS TO PARADISE This Singles Weekend in Paradise features Julie Nolan, a polar bear dive, campfire, and more. Sat., Mar. 27, 11am-11pm. Lazy J Paradise, 270 Hidden PathLockhart, 210/863-9314. $7 day pass. www.lazyjparadise.com
UT GENDER & SEXUALITY CENTER Your Longhorn queer hub, as it were. Regular business hours (Mon.-Fri., 9am-5pm) so you can learn about cool campus doin's like Queer Students Alliance, GLBTGrad, OutLaw, Queer People of Color and Allies, Transgender Texas, She Says, and more. 232-1831. gsc@uts.cc.utexas.edu www.utexas.edu (Civic Interest)
UT GSC LISTSERV UT's Gender & Sexuality Center maintains, among other fabulous things, a helluva listserv. To submit something for or to subscribe to the e-mail list, please send an e-mail. gsc@uts.cc.utexas.edu www.utgsc.com (Announcements)
VIOLET CROWN COUNSELING Specialized individual and relationship psychotherapy for the LGBTQIJKLMNOP and open-minded. More than 86 years experience between 'em. 796-3457. www.violetcrowncounseling.com (Meetings & Instructions)
WATERLOO MOVES NORTH Check out the new digs! Austin's hub for GLBT support and support groups has moved its hub up to the Highland Mall area. Just in time for the train. (If it ever runs on time. Or for that matter, runs.) Waterloo Counseling Center, 314 E. Highland Mall Blvd. #301, 444-9922. www.waterloocounseling.org (Meetings & Instructions)
WATERLOO'S HART PROGRAM Low- to no-cost mental health counseling and support for folks struggling with HIV or AIDS. Bilingual? ¡Sí! Waterloo Counseling Center, 314 E. Highland Mall Blvd. #301, 444-9922 x329. www.waterloocounseling.org (Meetings & Instructions)
WHAT'S GAYER THAN A CABARET? Not much. Check out Austin Cabaret Theatre's sassy-ass blog. Tell Stuart the Gay Place sent ya. www.austincabaret.blogspot.com (Announcements)

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