the score

UT Football

Horns Upset Tech 31-22 in Lubbock

Head coaching icon Mack Brown and defensive mastermind Manuel “Manny” Diaz shut up detractors Saturday afternoon when they inspired their charges to a 31-22 win over favored Texas Tech. Due to an editing error in last week’s “Hornucupoia” column, it appeared that I had pegged the Horns for “a certain defeat” against Tech. Read More | Comment »

8:00AM Sun. Nov. 4, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Coach Brown to Case: We're Not In Kansas Anymore

The Wizard of Obvious, Texas head coach Mack Brown, has tapped his rose-colored Nike slippers together and said, three times, “There no QB like Ash.” On Monday, Brown announced that David Ash, who was about as effective against Kansas as the ash some Catholics put on their forehead the first day of Lent, will return as starter Saturday against Texas Tech. Read More | Comment »

10:15AM Tue. Oct. 30, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Horns Win Thriller at Kansas, Yes Kansas

Would Mack Brown have called for a game-tying field goal from the one if Case McCoy doesn’t win the game with a clutch third down touchdown pass to D.J. Grant with 12 seconds left? We’ll never know. (Of course he would’ve taken overtime vs. a risk.) Case made caution moot. Read More | Comment »

2:35PM Sat. Oct. 27, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Horns Outscore Baylor in 11-on-11 Game

We beat Baylor! We beat Baylor. An October game against A&M Lite was the defining game of the season. That’s how things have gone for a Texas team that threw caution to the loss against a fraudulent West Virginia team 48-45 and then soiled the Sealy the next week against Oklahoma. A loss at home against Baylor would have been devastating. Read More | Comment »

11:39AM Sun. Oct. 21, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Texas/OU Halftime Report

Savannah State was laughing their asses off during the Horns’ 36-2 first half loss to Oklahoma. Horns halftime motivational speaker Joel Osteen was seen slinking out of the Cotton Bowl late in the second quarter, when OU had already amassed over 400 yards of offense to UT's single first down. Mrs. John Wayne Gacy had a better half. Read More | Comment »

1:37PM Sat. Oct. 13, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Horns Lose At Home Against John Denver Fans

I’ve never played the game, never studied X’s and O’s and so I’m constantly using football terms I don’t understand, like “bubble screen,” “weakside linebacker” and “starting safety Adrian Phillips.” I’m just a fan, but one with a certain shining. Read More | Comment »

10:05AM Sun. Oct. 7, 2012, Michael Corcoran and Michael Corcoran

'DKR: The Royal Scrapbook'

What does one buy for the grandpa that has 40 years worth of socks from grandma? How about a little reading material to go with his morning Folgers? Say, a handsome volume festooned with timeworn Longhorn football artifacts from the old timer’s day. Suck it, socks. Read More | Comment »

9:40AM Tue. Oct. 2, 2012, Russ Espinoza

The David Ash Era Has Begun

Joe Bergeron burrowed into the first inch of the end zone with 29 seconds left for a 41-36 victory on the road against a tough Oklahoma State team, keeping the Longhorns undefeated. It was a disputed game-winner, as replays showed Joe the Mole may have fumbled before he crossed the plane (if he did). Read More | Comment »

8:35AM Sun. Sep. 30, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Put a Fork in Vince Young?

Starry, starry night/ Portraits hung in empty halls/ Frameless heads on nameless walls/ With eyes that watch the world and can't forget - “Vincent” by Don McLean They’re calling him a loser, a bust, a naïve nitwit who blew $50 million during his six years in the NFL on strip clubs and child support and taking his boys out to the Cheesecake Factory. Read More | Comment »

9:07AM Tue. Sep. 25, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Horns Run, Pass All Over Ye Olde Miss

So much for, what they call in parts of Mississippi, “the Obama curse.” Two days after visiting the evil Muslim job-destroyer in the White House with the U.S. Olympic team, wide receiver Marquise Goodwin made an insane bolt between defenders for a 69-yard touchdown that led the Texas Longhorns to a 66-31 win at Ole Miss. Read More | Comment »

10:41AM Sun. Sep. 16, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Headed Out To See UT Beat Ole Miss in Oxford?

Tailgating in the Grove is a time-honored Ole Miss game-day tradition that goes back many generations, but since it is unlikely visiting UT fans will be invited to join any of those family gatherings, you'll need to have some dining options in mind for the big weekend. Read More | Comment »

2:39PM Fri. Sep. 14, 2012, Virginia B. Wood

Longhorns' Million Dollar Bash

Saturday’s 45-0 victory over the New Mexico Lobos, a team that has won four games in four years, concludes the Mountain West Conference portion of the Longhorns schedule. Texas paid a million dollars to the university of the state best known as where “Breaking Bad” takes place, just so the Horns could keep mountin’ W’s. Don’t meth with Texas! Read More | Comment »

1:37PM Sun. Sep. 9, 2012, Michael Corcoran

Partying on ESPN's Dime: Priceless

Started Saturday evening cursing the Longhorn Network, but ended the night wearing an LHN cap. Since I don’t have UVerse (long story, bro), I planned to watch the Texas vs. Wyoming football game at El Arroyo, but it was jam-packed. I ended up at Republic Square, where LHN had put on a viewing party for the public with a big screen in the park. Read More | Comment »

11:21AM Sun. Sep. 2, 2012, Michael Corcoran

U-Verse Adds Longhorn Network

Since last year's launch of the Longhorn Network – an all-UT, all-the-time station backed by ESPN in a $300 million deal with the university – it's struggled to gain a foothold in the Austin market. That changed today. Read More | Comment »

12:05PM Fri. Aug. 31, 2012, Monica Riese

'Hornucopia': Hello, New Season

Seinfeld went on to become the most commercially successful TV show ever, but it had a rocky start and needed a great second season to stay on the air. Longhorn fans pray for QB David Ash to have a similar sophomore turnaround, if there’s any hope for the Horns to become the masters of a domain, the Big 12, that has seen some shrinkage. Read More | Comment »

2:40PM Thu. Aug. 30, 2012, Michael Corcoran

'Out of Bounds': The Incredible Life of Ricky Williams

When Ricky Williams announced his retirement, the NFL and its fans lost one of the sport's most fascinating figures from the past decade in a half. An athlete who performed at the highest level on the field, he will be remembered for his eccentric lifestyle off the field as much as his record-breaking, highly successful college and pro careers. Read More | Comment »

4:20AM Sat. Mar. 31, 2012, Mark Fagan

'The NFL Beat': Browns Face Tough Decision at QB

I was in Cleveland the day LeBron announced he would be taking his talents to South Beach. I’ve performed music in Cleveland more times than I can count. One of the things I enjoy about touring is getting to meet sports fans of all different teams, and walks of life. In that one day I gained more respect for Cleveland as a fan base than I have for any other in my life. Read More | Comment »

4:20PM Sat. Feb. 18, 2012, Alex Dunlap

Texas D vs. Baylor Fire Bolt

Texas fans nibbled on Thanksgiving turkey and expected the worst. The Aggies could taste this win. They wanted to end the rivalry with forever bragging rights as they shuffled off to the SEC and leave the Longhorns with the beer-soaked, early-morning regret that is the Big 12. Read More | Comment »

12:44PM Thu. Dec. 1, 2011, Joe O'Connell

Fallen Warriors Remind of Roosevelt Leaks

Instead of pondering how Texas will survive its last three football games of this schizophrenic rebuilding season without Fozzy Whittaker, whose UT tenure was ended by a knee injury, I keep thinking back to Roosevelt Leaks. Read More | Comment »

2:40PM Fri. Nov. 18, 2011, Joe O'Connell

Horns/Tigers Preview

At 4-5, NCAA statistics disclose how the Missouri Tigers have contended with the nation’s fourth-toughest schedule. Though they lack a win of significance, one might consider at least three of their losses moral victories. Read More | Comment »

2:15PM Fri. Nov. 11, 2011, Russ Espinoza

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