Well, I told you so.
Raiders RB Darren McFadden blew a tire Week 9 against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in what turned out to be a case of the five syllables that fantasy owners hate the third-most. The Gold and Silver medal winners for this dubious distinction are "Dr. James Andrews" and "Lisfranc Injury."
When things get tough, you turn to your boys, and if the fantasy football season were MarioKart, we'd be on the level with the lava.
The one where you have to control your character over a long, spinning, metal cylinder that serves as a bridge over the river of molten rock below. Things are officially getting tough, and every move is critical.
With six games left in our fantasy football regular seasons, we have little time for useless chatter or the exchange of half-hearted pleasantries. It's not you. It's me. I need to move on to this next chapter. Week 8. This is "The NFL Beat."
You have gone on living your everyday life while I have lived in a basement. The small, eye-level window in the corner reveals a fluctuating pitter-patter of feet wearing nice shoes, productively tapping the adjacent sidewalk as their owners go about their days.
Regular marchers to "The Beat" know that one-half of my double-life is compromised of pounding out quarter, eighth, and occasionally sixteenth notes.
This weekend, worlds collide. I have never attended an ACL festival that Alpha Rev has not performed, because honestly, I don't like paying to go to concerts when I spend 75 days a year playing them.
This is "The NFL Beat" and I am backstage at Studio 6A. The birthplace of Austin City Limits, and its home for more than 30 years. I have a show here tonight, as well as a writing deadline. The show takes place onstage, the writing takes place backstage.
An NFL weekend is descending upon us, but first, I would like to congratulate you. Your fantasy team had a big win last week.
Even though you may have lost, you are still a winner for having learned a lesson. The same way that failed athletes and coddled child-stars-gone-bad are. A big winner.