News Ticker: November 6

David Barton backs down from the fight, Dan Patrick gets crafty, and Pete Sessions stays on message. Pomposity is on the News Ticker.

• We originally read this ABC headline about President Obama's Dallas visit as "Twerking Perry, Obama Pitches Health Care in Texas." We really didn't want to sleep tonight anyway.

• Christian "historian" David Barton announced on Glenn Beck's radio show that he could have totally whooped Sen. John Cornyn's ass in the primaries, but he is just so sore from lifting all those weights.

• Later in the show, Beck asked, "Has Louie ruled it out?," referring to fallow potato field Louie Gohmert. There is a distinct possibility that Beck is just looking for a good laugh.

• Still, Republican voters seem to not be on board for six more years of Cornhollyn. A Public Policy Polling poll (hey, alliteration!) finds the senior senator in "grave danger" of losing next year's primary. If only Ted Cruz could run for both seats.

• Relatedly, we guess it's possible that some of our readers have a fetish for blustery, pompous old men. We're here to serve.

• Sen. Dan Patrick is seemingly taking inspiration from Pinterest when it comes to Lite Guv campaign collateral. We can't wait to see the hand felted yard signs.

• Sen. Ted Cruz doesn't really understand how memes work.

• America's Voice Managing Director Patty Kupfer believes that Rep. Blake Farenthold should lead the fight for immigration reform. Honestly, she'd have more luck having him lead the fight against sandwiches.

• Sen. Troy Fraser says the voter ID law actually helped high voter turnout in yesterday's election, which is sort of like saying women walk by construction sites for the sexual harassment.

• U.S. Rep. Pete Sessions believes that Republican lawmakers should be concerned with messaging over actual governing. If that means they will skip voting, we're in!

• The Dish Network announced today that they will be closing their remaining 300 Blockbuster stores, including three in the Austin area. That's sad news for movie lovers who will now have to resort to Hulu, Netflix, Amazon, iTunes, HBO Go, YouTube, illegal downloading sites, or Redbox to rewatch Biodome. Consumers just aren't given enough choices.

• Comptroller Susan Combs on Tuesday defended her office's handling of the conservation of the dunes sagebrush lizard. Apparently, making threatened species into snazzy jackets wasn't exactly what environmental groups had hoped for.

• Annise Parker handily won a second term as Houston Mayor yesterday, even though Atty. Gen. Greg Abbott thinks she has cooties.

• Speaking of…we are no fans of Abbott, but can we stop it with the "he was for it before he was against it" rhetoric? Why can't headlines just say "Suck It Abbott" and be done with it?

• Sen. Wendy Davis is turning the tables on abortion foes by calling herself "pro-life." But, aha, those foes are turning the tables on her by being misogynists. Debate club is fun.

• IBM will be building a new facility in Austin as part of their ambitious project to have more buildings than workers.

• There is still plenty of need in the aftermath of Halloween flooding. Help your neighbors.