The Rude Mechs' resident playwright Kirk Lynn, we're told, years ago set himself the task of "fixing" Shakespeare's plays – at least, the ones that needed fixing. Well, if anybody can do that and do it right, it's Kirk Lynn. And now here come those Rudes and their talented friends with the first fixed play, about "one of history's shittiest kings, so obsessed with his own legacy that he drives his country to war, is willing to kill women and children, and rejects the authority of God and church." We reckon this thing will kick your ass in a most pleasurable fashion. Bonus: Even just the cast is to swoon for, you lucky theatregoers. Through Nov. 24. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 2 & 8pm $25.
The Off Center, 2211-A Hidalgo, 512/476-7833
A noirish shamus caper (written by Greg Klein) smackdab in the middle of the whole Mother Goose milieu? Drop the gat, ya double-crossing mug – the sheep's in the meadow and the cow's in the corn! Directed by Will Hollis Snider for Last Act Theater Company. Through Nov. 24. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 2pm. $15 ($12, students; pay what you can, Thursdays).
Dougherty Arts Center, 1110 Barton Springs Rd., 512/974-4000
's comedy hit from 1664, featuring the titular dastard of a con man doing his worst to undermine domestic tranquility, enfarces the Jones Theatre stage, with direction by Andrew Richey and Liz Fisher. Through Nov. 24. Thu.- Fri., 7:30pm; Sat., 3 & 7:30pm; Sun., 3pm. Southwestern University, Georgetown. $12-28.
Federico García Lorca's haunting, poetic drama is directed by Robert Tolaro for St. Ed's and features Equity guests Babs George and J. Ben Wolfe. Through Nov. 24. Thu.-Sat., 7:30pm; Sun., 2pm. $22 ($17, students, seniors, SEU community).
Mary Moody Northen Theatre at St. Edward's University, 3001 S. Congress, 512/448-8484
Murder. Greed. Corruption. Violence. Exploitation. Adultery. Treachery. Set amidst the razzle-dazzle decadence of the Twenties, this stupendously popular musical is the story of Roxie Hart, a housewife and nightclub dancer who murders her on-the-side lover after he threatens to walk out on her. You won't believe what happens next! Through Nov. 24. Fri., 8pm; Sat., 2 & 8pm; Sun., 1 & 7pm. $25.
Bass Concert Hall, 2350 Robert Dedman Dr., UT campus, 512/477-6060
Fri.-Sat., Nov. 1-23, 7:30pm. Extra show: Sun., Nov. 17, 2:30pm. $12-15.
Bastrop Opera House, 711 Spring St., 512/303-6283
You'd think the busy novelist Katherine Catmull
wouldn't have time to spend delighting us onstage these days … but then, how could anyone resist starring opposite the talented Jason Phelps
in this Mickle Maher
comedy about two college professors who, overcome by the poetry of William Blake, have sex on the lawn of their campus in front of their students? And this new show (by the playwright responsible for Spirits to Enforce
, remember?) is directed by Mark Pickell
for Capital T Theatre
. How great is this show? Our reviewer tells you that right here
.Through Nov. 23. Thu.-Sat., 8pm
Hyde Park Theatre, 511 W. 43rd, 512/479-7529
Gnap! Theatre Projects presents this commedia dell'arte-inspired adaptation of The Cherry Orchard, conceived and directed by Ben Schave – one of Austin's kings of physical comedy – and featuring a ridiculously talented cast (Joey Hood! Kerri Lendo! Michael Jastroch! Others!) performing this version of Chekhov's masterpiece entirely without dialogue. Tell you what: This is gonna be some wild, kazoo-spiked antics right here. Through Nov. 23. Thu.-Sat., 8pm. $15 ($8, students, seniors; pay what you wish, Thursdays).
Salvage Vanguard Theater, 2803 Manor Rd., 512/474-7886
A classic Agatha Christie murder mystery takes the stage to the heights of sleuthing and terror. See: Ten strangers, each with a dark secret, are summoned to the island mansion of an eccentric millionaire, but when the guests arrive their host is nowhere to be found … and the guests are being killed one by one. A terrific cast is directed by Lara Toner for Austin Playhouse, and you know somebody is gonna get out alive … right? Through Dec. 22. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 5pm. Austin Playhouse at Highland Mall, 6001 Airport, 512/476-0084. $28-35 (half price, students).
Robert Harling’s Southern-fried hit comedy is directed by Andy Berkovsky for City Theatre. Through Dec. 22. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 5:30pm. $15-25 ($10, Thursdays).
City Theatre, 3823-D Airport, 512/524-2870
Helen Merino portrays the ineffable poet Emily Dickinson in this acclaimed one-woman show written by Henry Luce. Presented for your entertainment and edification by Austin Shakespeare. Through Dec. 1. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 3pm.
Long Center for the Performing Arts, 701 W. Riverside, 512/457-5100
This show has nothing to do with the late Gertrude Yorkes or her Deinonychus, except that it's – of course – where that pair got their battle names. This is Joseph Kesselring’s macabre comedy in which drama critic Mortimer Brewster, intent on marriage, must deal with his crazy, homicidal family – among them, two spinster aunts who've been killing old men. Directed by Norman Blumensaadt for Different Stages. Bonus: Jennifer Underwood and Karen Jambon star as the murderous Brewster sisters. Through Dec. 14. Thu.-Sat., 8pm; Sun., 7pm. Extra show: Wed., Dec. 11, 8pm. $15-30.
The Vortex, 2307 Manor Rd., 512/478-5282
Richard Robichaux directs this Steve Murray one-man adaptation of the beloved Capra film It's a Wonderful Life, which sounds like a pretty decent holiday treat, y'know? Like, why the hell not? But then you learn that Martin Burke will be playing all 37 characters from the movie himself – and you realize it's more like an OMG-don't-miss-this-show situation at Zach Scott this holiday season. Through Dec. 29. Wed.-Sat., 7:30pm; Sun., 2:30pm. See website for more information.) $18-65.
Zach Theatre, 1510 Toomey, 512/476-0541